Before I can speak, he tells me, “Lucy, I feel so bad. I should not have let you be exposed in that way. None of it should ever have happened. I can’t do anything to make it up to you, I can only apologize.”
“Paul,” my eyes sting, “it’s not your fault. It’s the life you were born into. It’s just how it is.”
“No, Lucy. That’s not how it always is. The Morettis had a beef with the family. With me in particular. They should have brought it to me. What they did was totally out of line. I’ve dealt with Lucas Moretti. It will never happen again. All that matters to me now is that you’re safe. And you will be safe, forever. You have my guarantee.”
I don’t know what to say as he hands me the flowers. “Your mystery man, Lucy, he’s here. Ready to take care of you. Ready to give you all you want and everything you need.”
My heart pounds and tears fill my eyes. “You? You’re my admirer?”
He nods, nervous. But his eyes lock with mine. “I was scared to tell you. Thought it would freak you out to know how long I’ve been obsessed with you.”
I smile, despite everything that has transpired in the last few days. My fears fade as I look at Paul in a whole new light. The revelation makes me lightheaded. I reach for his hand, squeezing it. “I need to sit down. We should go inside.”
Inside, my apartment is bare and clinically clean. It reminds me of the hospital. Gently, I reach up to touch the bandage on his head. He takes hold of my hand.
“It’s okay. I’m fine.”
“You’d tell me that even if you weren’t.”
That actually gets a smile out of him. I soften and warm up inside.
He says, “True. But I am.”
I put the basket of flowers on the bare table.
He looks around the apartment.
“You must have worked hard. I saw how the place was.” Seeing me quiet, he holds out a hand to me. “The memory of that awful attack, I understand. Come with me. Come to the O’Malley compound. Come and live with me. Now, and forever.”
“I know what it took for you to give that speech, Paul.” I touch his hand. “JoJo told me you had a stammer when you were younger.”
He looks down. Like he’s ashamed.
His eyes tilt up at me, pleading and pained. I squeeze his hand. “She told me they sent you to doctors, therapists, specialists, and none of them could do anything.” He takes a breath to speak, but I go on. I don’t want him to stop me. “She said you got on top of it yourself. Nobody knew how you did it. I know how you did it.”
The brightness in his eyes is enough to make me weep. I hold his eyes with mine.
“When you were ready, Paul, you made the choice. Once you’d decided, that was it. Nothing could stop you. That’s you, Paul. When you know what you want, nothing can stop you.”
“We’ll see,” he says, holding me close. “Because I know what I want now, Lucy. I know you must have wanted to run as far and as fast as you could. Maybe you still do. And I don’t blame you. But I hope you’ll stay. I know that I may be the worst thing that has ever happened to you, but you are easily the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
“I can’t live in your world, Paul. I’ll never survive. I’m not strong enough.”
His arms enfold me. “I know that you’re more than strong enough. You can do it. And I want you to, more than anything, Lucy. But only if you want it. Otherwise, there’s just no point. And you don’t ever have to worry about survival or your safety. I’ll protect you.”
He kisses me. “If you’ll accept me, there’s nothing I won’t do to make you happy. Night and day.” He holds my shoulders and looks deep into my eyes. “You were my first, Lucy, and you’ll be my last. I don’t want any other woman. Not ever. You’re all that I want and everything I need. You are my everything girl and I will do anything to be your everything man.”
My eyes are brimming, and he tips my chin up towards his face.
“Do you want me, Lucy? Do you want me enough to try?”
I hesitate. I know what I should do. I should do what he said. I should run like there’s a fire at my heels. I haven’t the strength or the guts for the life he lives. I should say no and get out fast, while I still can.
But I want him. I’ve always wanted him, from the first moment I saw him. I never thought I would be strong enough for him, or sexy enough.