His chest pumps furiously as his anger rises. “Is that a crime? Would you want to hear that shit every time you went to the good doctor?”
“No, but I wouldn’t want to be fed fake hope, Jack. You’re bipolar. You can’t fix it, drink it away or get rid of it. It’s here to stay for life. And it’s about time you fucking dealt with it once and for all.”
We stare at each other in silence. My words sit between us like a gaping wound that needs to be healed. The kind of wound no one wants to go near because it’s too nasty and filthy to even know where to start fixing it. Or how.
Finally, he says, “I’m tired, Ashton. I’m tired of my own damn mind. And sometimes it’s easier not to hear how I keep fucking shit up.” All his fight is gone and that sends a chill up my spine. I need him not to give up. I need him to keep fighting.
“Let me find you a new doctor then.” My words come out in a ragged beg as I plead with him to let me help.
Still staring at me, but now through vacant eyes, he exhales a long breath. Waving his hand in the air, he says, “Fine. But make this one a woman. If I’m gonna spend my hours talking to someone, I at least want some tits and ass in the room.”
“I’ll book you an appointment for this afternoon. You need to shower and change into clean clothes between now and then.” No fucking way am I allowing him to surrender to this disorder.
“I’m going back to bed first,” he mutters as he walks past me into the hallway. I watch as he heads to his bedroom. Once the door closes behind him, I pull out my phone and call Jessica.
“Did you find Jack?” she asks, answering my call.
“Yes, and I need you to come over and babysit him today.”
She groans. “Really?”
“Yes, really,” I snap. “I’d do it myself if I could get out of work today.”
“You’re lucky I like you, Ashton. Jack is hard fucking work. You want me to come over now?”
“Yeah, I’ll wait here until you arrive.”
There’s no way I’m leaving him alone again until we get his mental state under control. Jack is far too important to me to lose.
* * *
By the time Jessica arrives, Jack has wandered back out into the kitchen where I’ve spent the last fifteen minutes searching for a new psychologist.
He glances at Jessica as she enters the kitchen to join us. “Hello, beautiful. I see Ashton has called in the big guns.”
She rolls her eyes before wrapping her arms around him and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “Ashton is lucky I like him and you’re lucky I love you.”
He doesn’t let her go when she tries to pull away. Rather, he slides his hands around her waist and rests them on her ass. “Why did I ever let you go?”
“Because you were dumb.”
A smile lights up his face and he chuckles. “I was. And now you’re into women so I have no chance at fixing my mistake.”
“Jack, I’m into women and men, but trust me when I tell you that I would never let you break my heart again. One doesn’t simply get over Jack Kingsley. My scars still hurt.”
His smile disappears and he lets her move out of hi
s embrace. “Fuck, I’m a bastard.”
She nods. “Yes, you are. But somehow you still make us all love you.” Turning to me, she says, “You should get going. I’ve got this from here.”
I nod as I scribble an address and time on a piece of paper. Eyeing them both, I instruct, “Your appointment is here at four this afternoon.” I direct my next question to Jessica. “I’ll be home by seven, maybe earlier. Are you good to stay until then?”
“Yes.” The way she clenches her jaw, though, lets me know this isn’t something she really wants to be doing. I can’t blame her. Jack threw her love away five years ago and took a chunk of her heart with him. While I know she’d do anything to help him, I also know that being with him is hard. It reminds her of everything they had and everything he did to kill their life together.
As the door to my home closes behind me, I hear her bossing Jack around and can’t help but smile. He deserves that. Thank fuck she agreed to today. I only hope she’ll be good for tomorrow as well because giving up my plans with Lorelei isn’t something I want to do.
15