So Jackson couldn’t take Dad’s place. In fact, Alex wasn’t sure whether he wanted a dad at all any longer.
* * *
KAYLA HELPED GRAMS light the candles on DeeDee’s birthday cake and they sang while she blew them out.
“You get your wish,” Morgan told her.
DeeDee gulped in a breath. “Nah, they’d never let a kid go into space. Maybe I’ll be a general or something.”
After they ate cake, Elizabeth took the leftovers into the RV and carried out a stack of wrapped gifts. DeeDee’s eyes lit up and she claimed to love everything, from the Kindle her grandparents gave her to Morgan’s gift cards for music downloads. She seemed surprised at receiving a present from Jackson and smiled shyly at him.
“Thanks, Jackson!” she said, holding up the hot pink Yellowstone sweatshirt and three equally bright T-shirts.
“You’re welcome.”
Once everything was put away and the dishes washed, they walked to the group area for a campfire program about Yellowstone put on by a park ranger. Jackson tried to engage Alex in conversation, but it didn’t go well. Alex finally edged away to talk with Morgan. DeeDee was the one who started chattering to Jackson about the horse-breeding program he’d mentioned that afternoon.
“You like horses?” Jackson asked.
“They’re fantabulous. I’ve read the Black Stallion books at least ten times,” DeeDee told him.
Kayla hid a smile. She didn’t know if all girls went through a horse-crazy phase, but she’d been the same at her daughter’s age. She’d introduced both her children to the classic horse stories written by Walter Farley.
“Morgan used to read those books—that’s why she named her stallion the Black,” Jackson said. “Do you ride, DeeDee?”
“Not yet. But my friend Keri goes to a riding stable every week, and after school starts, I get to go with her.”
“I could teach you when we get back to Montana. If it’s okay with your mother,” he added hastily.
“Yes, puleeze. Can I, Mom?” DeeDee begged.
“If there’s time,” Kayla told her. She’d originally planned to return to Seattle right after the camping trip, but the kids were asking if their two best friends could come to Schuyler for a visit. The Garrisons were ecstatic at the idea; Kayla was less sure and had said she’d decide later.
Jackson turned to Alex. “What about you? I’ve got several horses that are great for new riders.”
Alex shrugged. “I’ll think about it.”
“Good...uh...just let me know.”
Kayla focused on the ground as the park docent started talking. She didn’t know how to fix the tense push-pull between father and son, and a less-than-noble part of her still didn’t want it fixed. The closer Alex got to Jackson, the more she’d have to put up with him.
As a memory, Jackson hadn’t been important to her, and she didn’t want that to change. So why should she try to help? After all, did he deserve to have an easy time of it?
Deserve?
Kayla wrinkled her nose. That sounded vindictive, but she didn’t hate Jackson. He was just one of the people who’d let her down over the years. Still, it almost seemed as if he should have to earn a place in Alex’s life, because if he wasn’t willing to work through this difficult, painful stage, he might eventually fail Alex when it mattered even more.
The internal debate raged the rest of the evening and kept her awake most of the night. As the sky began lightening, she wearily sat up. Alex and DeeDee would be asleep for another couple of hours, and even her grandparents wouldn’t emerge from the RV for a while.
She looked through the open tent flap to where Morgan lay buried in her sleeping bag. Everyone had stayed up late looking at the stars through DeeDee’s new telescope, so she’d likely want to sleep in.
Quickly Kayla got dressed. There was a rough path circling the camping area—it would serve for a mild workout and still leave her energy if Morgan wanted to go running later.
After passing quietly between other campsites, Kayla reached the path and set off, trying to be quiet since it passed close to sleeping campers. She’d circled the area twice when she came upon Jackson, looking grumpy and perturbed.
She slowed and stopped. “What are you doing out so early?”
“I was concerned,” he snarled. “No one should take off alone here, but especially not a woman. What if you’d encountered a bear? We made rules for the kids and should all follow them.”
She raised her eyebrows. “I didn’t take off, as you put it. I stuck to the campground.”
“I was afraid you’d gone on one of the other trails.”