What are we doing together? I don’t know and I wonder if I ever will.
“Plus it’s a public place so that’ll aid your sex ban.”
I’m not looking at her but I can hear her smile through her tone. “Stop sounding so amused by that.”
“T, I don’t know the guy so I shouldn’t judge, but…”
“But you’re going to anyway, right?”
“But you’ve hardly been bouncing off the ceiling with happiness since you met him. I can’t say I understand what you see in him, he sounds like a tosser to me, but if you are going to keep seeing him, don’t let it all be on his terms. You want to go to the fair? Then go to the fucking fair.”
“But what if he doesn’t want to go to the fair?”
She rolls her eyes at me but doesn’t seem frustrated. I think she’s just making a point. “Then come pick me up and I’ll go to the bloody fair with you.”
“Thanks, Tess. I think.” Looks like I’m going to the fair one way or another today.
“But if I do go then you’re paying for the food. I paid a fiver last time for a hot dog the size of a rat’s dick.”
She makes me laugh. “Not sure what rats you’ve seen but I’m pretty sure you’ve uncovered a new species.”
“Whatever. Go brush your teeth. Your breath is knocking me sick.”
Great. Kicked out of my own bed by a woman that doesn’t even live here. “Yes, ma’am.”
**********
I’m nervous as hell when I approach James’ apartment building. My hand stutters over the call button for the penthouse several times while I try to gather enough courage to press it. I even turn around a couple of times but then tell myself, out loud, to quit being a pussy.
When I eventually push it I wait several seconds for an answer and sigh when it doesn’t come. I press it again and am about to give up when a man dressed in some kind of security uniform opens the door. Of course a place like this would have security. Dumbarse.
“I’m trying to reach the penthouse,” I say, stuffing my fidgeting hands into my jeans pockets.
“Mr Holden only stays here during the week,” he informs me.
“So…” Oh just give up. This is clearly a sign that your idea is stupid. “Where does he live at weekends?”
“I’m not his dad, kid. I have no idea.”
I decide this guy is a twat. “Right. Thanks.” I don’t know what I’m thanking him for. He doesn’t deserve the smile I can’t stop myself offering.
Deflated, I head back to my car. Two options remain now. Give up and go home, or give in and call James. The choices make me huff in frustration. James has instigated everything we’ve ever done together, which really is just sex, and I wanted to take charge for once. Surprise him. The memory that I have his brother’s number springs to the front of my mind and I contemplate dialling it for only a second before realising that would be weird.
Reluctantly, nerves bubbling in my throat, I call James.
“Hello, Theodore,” he answers. His voice calms me instantly.
How does he do that? “Hi. It’s, um, me.”
“I know that. I greeted you with your name.”
“Right. Yeah.” Fucking hell I’ve turned into a babbling moron. Pull yourself together. “Where are you?”
“Home.”
“No you’re not. I’m there right now.” I cringe when I’ve said it. I sound like a bloody stalker.
“I have more than one.”
Of course you do. Flashy, magnificent bastard. “Oh. I thought we could meet.” I sound nothing short of disappointed and I’m annoyed I’ve allowed it to filter into my tone.
“I’m not tagged, Theodore. I’m allowed to leave my house.” His sarcasm is so damn infuriating, yet I can’t get enough of him. Clearly, I’m a glutton for punishment. “Where would you like to meet?”
“I thought…” Crap. My idea feels even more stupid now I’m about to say it. “It’s probably not your thing, but there’s a fair at Heaton Park this weekend.”
“A funfair?”
Why does everyone feel the need to repeat it like it’s the most ludicrous thing they’ve ever heard?
“I like them,” I mutter, feeling like a giant dick.
“I haven’t been since I was a kid.”
Great. He thinks I’m a child.
“Meet you there in an hour?”
Oh. “Sure,” I agree. “Okay.”
“And, Theodore?”
“Yeah?”
“Lose the nerves. We’re getting to know each other, right? You like the fair. That’s something new I’ve learned about you today. I’m looking forward to discovering more.”
Well damn if words like that don’t make me want to set fire to my no sex rule.
“See you in an hour,” I say, ending the conversation with a smile so wide it makes my jaw ache.
I drive straight to the park, knowing I’ll arrive way too early, and hope I find out something new about him today, too.
As expected, I’m early. I get out of the car but stay close to the entrance while I wait for James. Even though I’m alone, a wide smile tugs at my lips. Looking over to the rides, games, and candyfloss stalls, I’m ten years old again.
There’s a light drizzle in the air but it doesn’t dampen the atmosphere. There’s laughter, happiness, everywhere. I feel like James and I need more of that. He’s always so serious, and although that intrigues me, he needs to smile more because when he does he’s fucking beautiful.
I walk around, my hands stuffed into my pockets, keeping an eye on the car park for around thirty minutes before I see him. There are strange flutters in my chest when he approaches. It sounds so cheesy but it’s the truth. He excites me. He makes me nervous. He even scares me a little. He makes me feel a thousand different things at once.
He looks hot as hell. It’s rare to see him out of a formal suit and a simple jeans and a black v-neck jumper make him look so much more…relaxed. He looks like he’s been plucked straight off the cover of a glossy magazine and I have no doubt that he knows it, too. When he reaches me, he rests one hand on my hip and kisses my cheek. It makes me feel giddy and I hope the fact I’ve turned into a lovesick fool doesn’t show on my face.