“Why do you think?”
I shook my head. “Why? Tell me.”
The ultimate question that somehow caused tears to form in her eyes. Her lip trembled, and when I tugged at it, she wet it.
“I was scared,” she breathed, my heart punching the walls in my goddamn chest. “I was scared for you. Scared I’d never see you again.”
The lump in my throat thick and hot, I choked it down, made myself look at her. Framing her face, I dragged her gaze up.
“LJ…”
“Want to know what scared me?” I asked her. “The last thoughts I had when Alexi Marvelli had me staring down the barrel of more than one gun.”
She cringed, her hands coming to lock around my wrists. “What?”
“Well, it wasn’t school,” I said, waving the hair out of her face. “And it wasn’t just my family. Though, I thought about them too.”
I thought about so many things, and yes, my family but she’d been right there with them. It’d been her face I found there too in the night. She’d been right there with them, a heavy fear that I’d messed up and never got to see any of them again for decisions I made. My jaw moved. “You were there in my mind, Billie. You. I had thoughts of you as one of my last, and I hate myself for that. I hate what I did to you. I hate that I hurt you.”
Tears finally fell as she trembled in my hands, her eyes closing. “Then why did you? Why did you do those things?”
“Because in the fucked up spaces of my mind, I thought I was doing it for my family. I worked with Alexi Marvelli, had a good relationship with him. He was a business partner, and I couldn’t have anything come between that. I’m all my family has, and the Marvellis and your dad are literally at war. Having anything to do with you would have been bad. Your dad’s that family’s enemy.”
“But what does my dad’s relationship with them have to do with me?”
“Because you’re close to him, Billie.” I dragged my thumbs across her cheeks. “You know, the Marvellis showed me your picture tonight? Alexi Marvelli
had your goddamn picture in his fucking hands. He knew who your dad was, your ties to me. He knew I love…”
I stopped just short, unable to go there. Because once I said that, it was over. I was hers, but she could never be mine. Not after all the things I did.
I said the words anyway.
“He knew that I love you,” I said and not past tense. I swallowed hard. “I love you, Billie.”
She was trembling so hard at this point, quivering. It drove me so fucking mad my mouth fell down on hers, claiming it.
A gasp and she gripped my shoulders, basically fusing our mouths and bodies together.
“I love you,” I breathed over her mouth, unable to hide it anymore. This girl had me undone to the point I thought I’d collapse beneath my own weight.
Her tears wet my cheeks during the kiss, that same passion I felt coming right back to me. I had no idea when all this had changed, but it had. She’d claimed me.
And I marked her.
“I love you, LJ.” Her hands seared over my body like hot wax, each touch the best fucking burn. She sighed when my tongue flicked out, tasting hers. A reach and I forced everything off the island, picking her up and setting her on it.
“I’m so sorry,” I gritted, unable to get enough of her softness and taste. “I’m so fucking sorry for everything I did to you.”
I couldn’t be sorry enough, her body quaking in my hands. I tugged her shirt off and saw just a sports bar hugging her full tits. The thing gave her cleavage like a motherfucker, the swell of her breasts flushed and heated.
Growling, I dove between the pair, licking from one swell to the other. She gripped my hair as I worked the bra off, releasing her breasts. I drew a nipple instantly into my mouth, laving, and she dug her fingernails in my abs.
“Christ, beauty queen. Christ.” I bit hard, and she cried out against my teeth, the sound literally reverberating through her entire chest. Yanking her shorts off, I realized she wore just as few undergarments as I did.
My groan hit the room at the smell of her sex, a glistening heat between her legs when I widened them. I dragged my hands down her legs. “I need a taste.”
And I did, sucking her lower lips right into my mouth. So sweet, my tongue tunneled directly into her heat, drinking her in.