I wanted to come by and see you and Abby. Does this evening work?
“Everything okay?” asked Georgia Valentini, one of the two chefs and owners of Valentini Farms B and B. She was technically my boss, but I considered her a friend as well. “All the color just drained from your face.”
I looked up and blinked at her. Gave her the usual lie. “Fine.”
“You sure?” She cocked her head as she tied an apron at the back of her waist.
“Yes. It’s…” I felt dizzy and sweaty hot all of a sudden and had to close my eyes, take a few deep breaths.
“Hey.” Georgia took my arm and led me over to a chair. “Sit down. I’l
l get you some water.”
“Thanks.” I lowered my head between my knees and waited for the uneasy feeling to pass, listening to the clink of ice cubes in a glass and the running faucet.
“Here.” Georgia placed the glass on the table and took the chair opposite mine.
Grateful, I took a few sips of cold water. “Thanks. I had a little dizzy spell there.”
“Have you eaten today? Did you have lunch?” Her eyes held concern.
I nodded, but I couldn’t recall if I actually had.
“Probably not enough.” She got up and went to the huge fridge, pulling the door open. “I’m getting you something.”
I didn’t have it in me to argue. Sleep hadn’t come easy the last couple nights, and exhaustion was catching up with me. “Okay.”
A moment later, she set a plate of chicken salad in front of me with two deviled eggs on the side. I wasn’t hungry, but I dutifully took the fork she held out and poked at a grape in the salad. “Thanks.”
She sat down opposite me again. “Want to tell me what’s going on? You’ve been sort of tense and quiet the last couple days.”
“Have I?” I frowned. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. You’re entitled to be quiet sometimes. Everything okay?”
“You don’t have time to deal with my issues. You need to prep for dinner.” It was Labor Day weekend, and we were fully booked with reservations.
“I have time. And Margot will be here shortly to help. Spill.”
I took a breath. “It’s Wes. He wants to come over later, and seeing him is really hard for me. I ran into him the other day, and it’s got me all messed up.”
Georgia nodded in understanding. Her husband Pete, who was the other owner and chef here, had grown up with Drew and Wes, and she’d met them both. “I bet.”
“And the thing is, rationally, I know I should just face the fact that I have to get used to seeing him. It’s not his fault he looks just like Drew or that being around him is a trigger for me.”
“But fuck rationally.”
I sighed. “Exactly.”
“So what’ll you do?”
“What can I do?”
“Tell him it’s a bad night.”
“Putting him off tonight only delays the inevitable, though. And it isn’t fair to him. Or to Abby.” I pushed some chicken salad around the plate.
“What if you dropped Abby off at your in-laws’? Then you wouldn’t have to be around him.”