But my resolve is suddenly gone when my balls seem to be missing. I blame the shotgun. Not really. I blame those blue eyes staring into mine right now, because I don't think I could handle it if she ever stopped looking at me the way she is in this moment.
I can't do it. If this doesn't work, I'll lose her. And that's not acceptable.
"It's nothing. We'll... talk later. I'm starving."
It takes a hell of a lot of strength to give her a reassuring grin, but I manage, and it's worth the effort it takes when she smiles back.
Chapter Ten
Getting Bad
"I'll take the pink ones," I say, motioning to the skis on the wall.
The girl behind the counter smiles, but I barely acknowledge her. I'm nothing more than a ball of nerves, and I keep chickening out every time Raya gives me an opening. Why the hell won't she come to me? I've played the game perfectly.
"Dude, you've got it some kind of bad," Tag says from behind me, laughing. Bastard. Why did I invite him to help me?
"Shut up," I grumble, paying for the skis while Tag draws the attention of the flirty cashier.
"How much shit are you going to buy her? It's just a week."
I might have gone overboard, but I want her to have everything she needs before we go, that way it doesn't look like I didn't think of her. Jumping through fucking hoops. What the hell has happened to me?
"I just want to make sure she doesn't have to worry about anything," I murmur mildly.
"And you're buying her pink shit?" Tag laughs, leaving the cashier to follow me out.
"Pink is for girls, and Raya happens to like girly stuff. She buys pink stuff fairly often, so yes. I'm buying her pink shit."
Tag just laughs. Jerk. I hope he understands one day. And I hope he's forced to feel just as crazy as I feel these days.
"Now that you've bought one of everything in pink, how about we hit Silk? It's open tonight, and I want to see Dane."
"Why is Dane there?" I ask, frowning.
/> Tag's smile grows as he tucks several of my bags under his arms and helps me carry out the massive amount of supplies. I hope Raya likes it.
"He bought the place."
My jaw tries to drop, but I pull it back in. Dane's not on my people-to-like list.
"Nah. I should get back and rest up. It'll be a long day tomorrow."
Tag rolls his eyes, a knowing grin on his face. I don't care if he does know I'm pathetic. I really don't have time to scrape together my dignity. Every day with Raya is better. I keep praying for a flaw, anything to wake me up. But all she does is suck me in deeper, making it impossible for me to do anything else besides be close to her. I actually hate going to class, because I don't get to see her during those times.
So pathetic.
Tag helps me load up before walking away and mocking me, calling me a few names that all refer to me being "whipped."
I flip him off while driving by, prompting his laughter to roar louder, and I hurry home. Raya had some random errand to run today, and she refused to let me go. She also wouldn't tell me what she was doing, so I assume it was probably some sort of "female" thing. There's no other reason for her to keep secrets.
When I pull up in the driveway, I notice a dark SUV parked at the curb in front of the house. Not sure what's up with that. I'll call to have it towed if it's there much longer.
I can't help but smile when I walk through the door, hoping Raya's home. I don't even bother unloading everything because I want to see her first. I start calling out for her as soon as the door opens. It's unlocked, so she has to be here.
"Raya? You home? I went and got everything we need for tomorrow—"
Who the hell is in my living room? Why is he so close to Raya? Hell no. She had so better not have gone out on a date. But the ridiculously sexy pajamas she's wearing make me almost sick. She's apparently pretty fucking comfortable with him to be wearing those in front of him.