"Yeah," I drawl out, feigning a yawn. "Maybe Ember has left my room. I'd like a shower, too."
He tenses up, which is odd. "If she's not, then just come back down. You can use my shower when I'm done."
Images of me climbing in the shower with him attack my already scandalous mind. Stop it, Raya!
"You okay?" I ask.
Shit. It must have really pissed him off to be touching me. I'd find it offensive, but I'm starting to understand his way of thinking. I'd ruin his reputation in the business world, considering I come from nothing. And he doesn't even know about my father's scandals that would really destroy his pretty name.
A washing sense of disappointment cloaks me, almost drowning me with severe realizations. I have to stop thinking about him like this. I'm the daughter of a conman. It would ruin him if people thought we were really together. I have to squash those rumors if he's ever going to be anything in a world full of socialites who judge so harshly.
"Yeah. I'm fine," he finally says through a sigh, but I've already left the bed and have almost reached the door.
I don't acknowledge his words. I don't know why this suddenly bothers me so much. Maybe it's because, even though I kept telling myself no, I kept hoping something might could happen. It can't though. If anyone ever found out I belong to Ray Drivel, my name would destroy Kade and his future. No one would trust anyone connected to Ray.
I almost run up the stairs to my room. Ember's ass had better be out. When I open the door to see the bed made, deceitfully seeming clean and pretty, I sigh in relief. It's then the first tear falls from my eyes.
I moved out here to get away from my past, only to learn there's no chance of ever having a better life because of it. I can work like hell to redeem my name, but I'll always be linked to the notorious man. They won't care what an incredible, loving father he is. It'll only matter what he once did.
A tiny knock at the door makes me flinch, but I steady myself before answering. "Yeah?"
"Raya?" Kade says as he steps in, seeming uncomfortable.
He's still freaked out about this morning. "Yeah," I murmur again, moving my eyes back down to the book I'm not really reading.
I've been on the same page for over an hour. My mind is too busy to make room for reading. I've been sorting through the numerous ways to squash this rumor about Kade and me.
"You okay? You haven't come out of your room all day. Did... Is... Does this have anything to do with this morning?"
This morning when you freaked out for touching me? No. Never.
I almost roll my eyes at my mind's snide remark. "I don't know what you're talking about. I have to finish reading this for class. The only thing that happened this morning was you woke up and took a shower. Beyond that, nothing else happened."
I look up just as he pockets his hands. His eyes are on the floor, his body is rigid, and his lips are in a tight line.
"You... Look, I don't know why I was spiraled around you or why you're pretending you didn't notice, but we can't make this awkward. I apparently like the way you feel when I sleep. No big deal."
No big deal. Nice to know. It was a huge deal to me.
"Kade, I really do have to read this. As for you liking the way I feel when you sleep, I honestly have no idea what you're talking about."
I grin up at him, praying he doesn't see how forced it is. He relaxes a little, and then comes to flop down on my bed beside me. I wish he'd just leave.
"New sheets?" he asks, smiling at the bed dressed anew.
Fortunately, Kade has tons of freshly packaged sheets in the hall closet.
"Two strangers were in my bed, so yes. New bedding all around."
He frowns, almost as if he's confused. "It wasn't Ember in here?"
"Ember is still a stranger. I just met her Friday. I only invited her because she's one of the few people I've met that wasn't making fun of me."
He breathes out heavily and pulls his phone out of his pocket. "You're different today."
My phone buzzes on the table beside me, and I answer as I reach over to get it. "I'm just exhausted. Someone made me go to this party until early this morning."
He smiles as I check the message on my phone. An involuntary grin spreads when I see the message is from Kade, who really did program his number into my phone.