I just smiled as I thought of the incredible week we had just spent together. My insecurities weren't going to sour this moment. I was going to relive the past five days for as long as I could.
I thought of how wonderful his body had felt when it had been pressed tightly against mine, and how perfect his lips felt against my skin. I thought of how ridiculously good he smelled all the time. I could smell him on my clothes and in my hair. Do not sniff yourself!
I had been dying to get back to this, and now we were here. It was heaven and hell in one screwed-up, forbidden, impossible relationship, but it was the best thing in my life.
The white corner of a piece of paper that was sticking out from the suitcase caught my eye. Curious, I pulled it out and opened in, never bothering to check to see if it was even mine. The second I learned that it was mine, I went pale as a wave of nausea passed over me, leaving an aching emptiness in its wake.
Chapter 11
Lost and Found Love
It's hard to give up on something you love. It's even harder to give up on someone. But sometimes the mind, heart, and body can only take so much before it becomes numb.
It had been over four weeks since I had last heard from Tallis. No one would tell me anything about him. I assumed he was at home, but I had been under constant supervision—confined to the house. Iris worried about my safety more than ever.
The letter was ashes in the fireplace downstairs. But the damage was done and the words were burned in my brain.
My sweet Aria,
I'm so sorry for doing this, especially in this manner. I feel cowardly writing this letter, but I can't do this in person. I physically can't do this in person. I'm not strong enough to tell you I can't see you anymore. I have to break this link between us. I don't know why it's as strong as it is, but I can't risk hurting you.
I almost kissed you so many times. It was exhausting to fight the constant temptation. I reached the point where I was ready to quit fighting, and that's just unacceptable.
I can't be around you for a while. I'm not sure how long exactly, but I won't come around you until I know I have broken the link. I came around you too soon the last time. I knew I still felt strongly toward you, and I should have stayed away. I just made it worse, and then this incredible week was simply intoxicating, sealing my fate.
I could have stayed there with you forever. You're safe now, and well guarded. I know that this doesn't make it any easier, and I'm sorry. I promise I'm doing this for the right reasons. I couldn't live with myself if I hurt you. Please help Amelia get her power under control. It will be harder to come back if she doesn't. I do love you, and I am so very sorry. More sorry than I can ever truly express with words.
Tallis
Bitter was a kind word to express how I felt after reading that. The news spread through the house, and I became everyone's project—distract Aria.
One thing that I had been distracted by was Anesta's newfound happiness. She wasn't unpleasant at all anymore. The night of Jaslene's vision, Anesta had found a soul mate. He was a changer and a friend of the Verdans. I honestly didn't know she knew how to smile that big until recently.
She thanked me almost everyday for opening everyone's eyes to the truth. It only made sense that if a bodyguard could be good or bad; a witch could be good or bad; then why couldn't a changer be good or bad instead of just bad? Magical people were stubborn like that.
Henry and Amelia tried not to be too obviously affectionate in front of me. Amelia could feel my pain, and sometimes she would project it on Henry to remind him that he shouldn't be all over her. I mostly stayed confined to my room. I would sketch for hours. The same thing over and over—Tallis.
Graduation had come and gone, but he'd been absent. No doubt he was doing all he could to stay far, far away from me.
Ignoring the dull pain in my chest, I walked out side to meet Jay and Ayla after he'd sent me a text. As soon as I saw the blonde queen serenity, she sent a wave of calm toward me, easing some of the ache.
"I was wondering if you wanted to get out for a while. I had my car crested to protect you. We can ride with the top down and get some fresh air.
Forcing a smile, I murmured, "Thank you, Ayla, but I'm not up for it. I just want to swim for a while and go to bed."
Ash walked up, surprising me, since I hadn't seen her much lately.
"Let's all go, Aria. It's killing us to see you this way. You need to get out."
Ah crap. Ash would never let me stay behind.
"Well, get Amelia to come," I grumbled, deciding if I had to go, then so did she.
"Can't. She and Henry are practicing on her focusing techniques. She's determined to learn how to stop projecting," Ash said casually, not noticing my subtle wince.
Amelia was killing herself in an attempt to stop projecting so that Tallis could return sooner. Grudgingly, I got in the car, sitting behind Ayla as she took the driver's seat. Ash got in on the passenger side, making her diagonal from me. I was glad to be in the back since I wasn't feeling particularly chatty.
The wind flew through my hair as we drove down the road, passing the grazing pastures for horses. We stopped at a red light, and some guys in a convertible jeep pulled up beside us, whistling obnoxiously while singing us praises. We just rolled our eyes and drove on.