I lean in to kiss Danny, but at the last minute he turns his head so that my lips land on his cheek. The awful feeling in my stomach intensifies a bit, but then I remember that Danny’s never really been that big on PDA. It’s fine. Everything is fine.
“Hey, how’s your day going so far?” I ask with fake cheer as I settle into a chair.
Danny nods vaguely, his blue eyes distant.
“It’s been a little busy this morning. One of the buildings on campus had a network outage, and it took the entire morning to get it back online.” He rubs his forehead and then his temples in the way he always does when he’s upset or tense.
“Are you okay?” I ask. “You normally don’t let work overwhelm you this way. It must be getting really out of hand over at NYU. Can’t they get you some help?”
He sighs. “They’re currently trying to get a few interns from the computer science department to come work part-time, and that’ll give us some relief. But honestly, it’s not enough. Interns are not the solution.”
I frown.
“Well, it sounds like this needs to be a quick lunch then. Let’s order so you can get back asap. I know you’ll do a great job!” With that, I smile and gesture to get the server’s attention.
But Danny hesitates.
“Wait, Rachel,” he says. The server strolls over and Danny shoots him an apologetic look. “Can you give us just one more moment please?”
“Sure,” the cheery woman chirps. “Just let me know when you’re ready.”
Danny nods and then slowly turns to me, his eyes regretful.
“There’s something I want to talk to you about.”
Oh shit, oh shit. Alarm bells go off in my head, but I force myself to smile. “That’s funny because I had something I wanted to talk to you about, too.” I grin at my boyfriend, but this time, he doesn’t return it. Shit. “Can I go first?”
He sighs a bit. “Sure, Rach. Go ahead.”
“So, I was thinking about our relationship.”
“Yeah? Me, too,” he replies, perking up a bit with interest. I plow ahead.
“Actually, I’ve been thinking a lot about the current state of our relationship, and I think it’s time for a change.” I smile at him again, and this time, he actually looks eager. My heart starts to beat a little faster. Maybe I’ve misread everything the last couple of weeks after all? Meanwhile, Danny nods whole-heartedly, his black hair flopping over his narrow forehead.
“It’s funny you say that because I’ve been thinking the same thing,” he rushes.
“Right. I mean, we’re not getting any younger, and I’m pushing thirty, so…” I trail off and shoot a look at him.
He looks confused.
“Um, so…?”
I beam at him, forcing a bright smile.
“So I think we should get married! Don’t you think that too? I mean, of course we’ll be engaged first, so we don’t have to rush into anything. But we have been dating three years, so I think it’s time. Don’t you?”
The words come out a mile a minute and my voice is way too high-pitched for some reason. But the look on Danny’s voice stops me short. “What’s wrong?” I ask. “What happened?”
My boyfriend looks positively ill, and all the blood has drained out of his face.
“Well, I wasn’t really thinking along those lines,” he begins.
“Really?” I ask, utterly confused. “Well, what were you thinking then?”
He shoots me a shame-faced look and then stares at the table.
“Well, I was going to say that we should date other people, Rach. You know, maybe take a break from the relationship and expand our horizons.”
I stare at him, horrified. Is this really happening? Is Danny Roose breaking up with me after I’ve already invested three years of my life in this relationship? I clap a hand over my mouth as my heart swoops and then plummets to my feet.
2
Rachel
“What?” I gasp. “What do you mean?”
He looks angry and ashamed at once. “Well, I just mean that I’m not feeling it right now. Or anymore. So I think we should take a break, or even break up altogether if that’s what we decide.”
I stare at him some more as adrenaline rushes through my veins. How did my proposal end up like this?
“I don’t get it, Danny,” I finally stammer. “We have three years invested in this relationship, and you’re just done? What the hell? Why didn’t I see it coming? Why didn’t you say anything if you were so unhappy?” I sit there as my ears ring, and I realize I’m in shock.
He looks down and then shoots me a guilty look.
“Well, the truth is that I’ve met someone, Rach.” The information leaks out like the air from a deflating balloon, and I’m flabbergasted.
“You’ve met someone? What does that even mean? You meet people every day at your job!” My shock is now wearing off into anger, and I clutch at the emotion. It feels better to be pissed and outraged, rather than sad and pathetic.