“Uh,” I replied, trying to decide how to word this.
“You can keep me company,” Saul said and then put a cigarette I didn’t know he had to his lips.
I stood there unsure what to say.
“Great, I’ll be back after I take some of Drake’s money,” Rio said and gently patted my upper back before walking toward the door. He was just going to leave me out here. Alone. With Saul.
Nine
“I’ll put it out if you don’t like the smoke,” Saul said when I made no move.
I shook my head. “No, it’s okay. I don’t mind,” I replied and unable to help myself added, “But those things can kill you.”
I wasn’t sure if that was a smile or a smirk on his face from where I stood. The shadows made it hard to see.
“I’ve heard something about that,” he replied then waved the hand holding his beer at the padded lounge chair connected to his. “I don’t bite. For the most part.”
I couldn’t continue to stand here and be awkward. Walking over to sit beside him, however, was difficult. I managed to appear as if he didn’t make me nervous or at least I hoped I did. Taking the seat beside him, I stretched out my legs in front of me and crossed them at the ankles. All the while giving myself an internal pep talk.
“How long are you staying in town?” he asked me.
I didn’t want to explain the list Gran had left me to him. “For the summer, I think.”
He didn’t respond to that for a few moments, so we sat in silence. He might have been waiting on me to say something more but what did one say to a guy who you were aware didn’t want you at his house?
“You’re nervous around me,” he said finally. He didn’t sound amused when he said it. He didn’t sound anything. It was a simple statement.
“It’s your house and you’ve made it clear you don’t want me around your friends,” I replied honestly. If he was going to bring it up, then I was going to put it out there.
“Yet you’re here,” he said then turned his head to look at me, as if challenging me to respond to that as quickly as I had the last.
“Rio invited me,” I replied.
“And you came.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I did.” Because what else could I say?
“Drake ask you for a blow job yet?”
The way he so casually said the word blow job caught me off guard. I let out a short laugh. “Yeah, he mentioned it.”
Saul took another pull from his cigarette. “Figures,” he replied.
“Does he ask all females that?”
“Just the ones that are breathing,” Saul said and cut his gaze back to me with a half-smile on his lips.
“Glad I made the exclusive list then,” I replied.
Then he laughed. It was a low, deep laugh, but it made me feel all tingly inside. I’d made him laugh. I wish it didn’t feel so nice but it did. He wasn’t just unattainable; I didn’t want to attain him either. He was nothing like Will. Saul was not the security I longed for and missed so terribly.
A door opened and I turned my head to see the blonde from the red convertible. Her hair was piled in a messy bun on top of her head with tendrils hanging down, yet she still looked stunning. I looked nothing like that with my hair in a bun. The short white dress she was wearing hung off one shoulder and highlighted her golden tan.
She didn’t say anything at first, just stared at me as if she were measuring me up. Did she think I was some sort of threat to her? Her eyes finally shifted from me to Saul. In the darkness, I couldn’t read her expression and I wished I could. I needed to know if I should exit the situation swiftly or not.
“I’m lonely,” she said and moved from the doorway to saunter toward us or just him.
“I thought you left,” he replied and I glanced over at him to see he was taking another drag from his cigarette.
“Just to take a shower and change,” she replied as she reached the end of his lounge chair then moved to crawl on top of him. It was seductive and I felt in the way.
Saul appeared amused, but he said nothing as she straddled him. He seemed to welcome her body and closeness. There was a small tug inside I knew was jealousy, but it couldn’t be over Saul. It was just I missed having someone. I missed touching and being touched. I watched as he put his cigarette out before placing his hand on her thigh. I decided it was time for me to go now.
“I think I’ll go see how Rio is doing with the uh… game,” I said as I stood up.