“I can do bedtime.” Isaiah headed him off at the stairs. He’d been in this strange self-sufficient mood all evening, refusing help with dinner, giving Mark clipped answers when he’d asked if Isaiah needed him to distract the kids so he could work on his website. Now, he looked utterly wrung out—slumped shoulders, dark eyes, deep lines around his mouth.
“Nope.” Mark used the same voice he trotted out for recruits who wanted to argue with him about the need for medical attention. “You’re going to take a bath. A long one. You’ve had a crappy day. Let me do this.”
“But—”
“I doubt I make it back in time for bedtime much the next few days. Long shifts again. Use me while you got me.” He tried for a smile, but the one Isaiah gave him in return was seriously weak.
“At least let me do Liam—”
“Go.” Mark used his instructor voice again, which got a slow blink from Isaiah. And got him moving, eyes going from tired to something more heated. He’d noticed that Isaiah liked it when he got bossy in the bedroom. Which was kind of funny, because he was so take-charge and staunchly independent ordinarily, but it seemed to turn him on when Mark took over whatever they were doing in private.
And if bossiness got him listening to Mark when he tried to apologize again, well then, he wasn’t above using it there either.
Luckily, Liam was fairly sleepy thanks to his lost nap earlier in the day, and went down without much fuss. Mark rocked him while reading to the girls. Multitasking for the win.
“I like your voice for Goose best of all.” Daphne sighed as she cuddled into her blanket.
“Thanks.” Mark’s sinuses burned. Whatever it takes. I’m keeping this family together.
Finally, he crept from the room, gently depositing sleeping Liam in his crib. Now onto operation Make Isaiah Happy Again. Thinking fast, he grabbed two beers from the fridge and went to knock on the master bath’s door.
“Yeah?”
“Can I come in?” Mark stuck his head in. “I brought you a beer.”
“Okay.” Isaiah had used the light dimmers, giving the room a pale glow, augmented by the candles. He was submerged up to his neck in sudsy water, but he stretched out an arm for the drink. Some female singer Mark didn’t recognize was crooning out of the speakers.
He brought Isaiah the beer, crouching next to the tub. A month ago, hanging out like this, Isaiah naked in the tub, would have made him uncomfortable, but now it just felt...normal. Something they did. Intimate, but not awkward.
“I’m sorry.” He tried again, hoping he could do a better job this try. “For at the egg hunt. And also for the social workers. I didn’t mean to trivialize your worries there.”
“You didn’t.” Isaiah took a long sip of his beer. “But at the hunt...” He shook his head, damp curls bouncing.
“I could have handled it better,” Mark admitted.
“Do you want Mary Ellen to set you up with her sister?” Isaiah studied the mosaic tiles, not Mark’s face.
“What? God no.” A second, less palatable thought occurred to him. “Why? Did you want Blondie’s number?”
“Blondie huh?” Isaiah chuckled. “No, not even tempted. He was a kid. And, in case, you hadn’t noticed, I’m kind of busy with you.”
“And the kids,” Mark added automatically.
“No, with you. We’ve got something going here, or at least I thought we did. Was I wrong?” Isaiah said the last piece so softly that Mark had to strain to hear. “And maybe it doesn’t matter—”
“Of course it matters.” Reaching out, Mark patted his arm. “And yes. We do have something going. But it scares me, trying to figure out what it is.”
“You? Big bad SEAL medic scared?” Isaiah gave him a considering stare.
“I don’t know what to call us. Mary Ellen asked her question and I just froze,” Mark admitted. “I know you’re big on labels. Titles. But I’m still working out me. Be patient with me? Just a little?”
“Okay.” Isaiah nodded, but didn’t look particularly happy about it. “I just don’t want to be a dirty secret. Or some sort of afterthought in your life—”
“Ike. You are my life. You. The kids. You’re the thing keeping me sane as I deal with the mess of my life. I’m not sure what I’d do without you. I mean that.” Mark squeezed his hand. “I’m just here trying to make sense of everything that’s happened in the last month and half or so. Everything’s changed.”
“I know.” Isaiah squeezed his hand back. “It has been fast. And we’re both dealing with a lot of shit.”
“I don’t want to stop this.” Mark gestured between them. “Us. Whatever we’ve got going on. This is the best thing I’ve got right now.”
“Really?” Isaiah gave him a smile that seemed more genuine.
“Really.” Mark kissed his hand.