you’d like the world to think,” he finished.
She swallowed. “Um, is there a compliment in there somewhere? ’Cause I think I missed it.”
“It wasn’t meant as an insult. I guess I’m wondering why you let me in?” he asked, staring down at her.
“I don’t know.” She frowned, realization hitting her hard. “Other than Bianca, no one else has ever been in this room.” She regretted the words as soon as she said them. She didn’t know why it mattered, but it did.
His gaze was heavy, unwavering...piercing.
Panic set in. She didn’t want to do this. She didn’t want emotions getting in the way, dammit. But, right now, her emotions were freaking her out. Yes, he’d done things to her body, made her feel things that no one else ever had. Somehow, it was more than that. For the first time in her life, her heart was involved, and it scared the shit out of her. She’d spent her whole life guarding herself, preventing herself from feeling any misguided and sentimental crap for a man. But none of that seemed to matter now. Because even though she’d never fallen in love before, she was pretty sure falling in love with a man she had nothing in common with was a very bad idea.
Wait... Love? With Patton? No. No way in hell she was going to let that happen. She was doing just fine on her own. Hell, she liked being on her own. She ignored the sharp pain in her chest and pushed out of his arms. She didn’t need him. Without a backward glance, she hurried into the bathroom. “Shower,” she called out before closing the door and having a panic attack.
* * *
PATTON STOOD OVER the grill, flipping the hot dogs and hamburgers while his brother and cousins debated the same old things—whose truck was better, which football team was better, what beer was better and what his mother had made for dessert. She never told anyone, just to see what they came up with.
He’d always been the big brother to them—too big to be part of the group and too mature to want to be. Zach and Spence had always been supercompetitive. His cousins, Dean and Jared, were about the same age. They’d grown up three blocks over and, ever since they could ride bikes, the four of them had been getting into trouble. Five when Russ was around. Russ had always been good at finding trouble. When Spence and Russ joined the force, Jared and Dean joined with them. Every task, every test and every certification had been a contest. But when Spence and Russ went into narcotics, Jared and Dean had followed their father into homicide.
“Don’t forget about my meatless patties,” Lucy said, putting a plate beside him.
“Like you’d let that happen?” he asked, smiling at his cousin.
Lucy was Dean and Jared’s little sister. She was a character—strong willed and vocal. But that was probably because she was the only girl amongst very loud, very rambunctious male cousins. Even outnumbered, she almost always got her way. She smiled broadly. “Thanks for cooking. I brought an extra in case you want to try one?”
“No, thanks. It’s not a burger without meat,” he argued. “Even Mikey would know that.”
Mikey raised his head off his paws to look at his master, his tail thumping.
“No food,” Patton said. “Not yet, Mikey.”
Mikey yawned and rested his head on his paws again, looking bored.
“I bet Mikey would think they’re yummy,” Lucy cooed at the dog, going to sit by the large yellow lab that was, truly, Patton’s best friend.
Mikey rolled over, offering Lucy his stomach.
“He has a real eye for the ladies.” Patton laughed at his dog’s antics.
“Don’t burn those,” his mother called out as she walked by, carrying a bowl with a mountain of potato salad.
“Yes, ma’am.” No point in arguing with her. He knew what he was doing. He’d been the grill master since his father’s death, and he’d yet to burn a piece of meat.
“Don’t you sass me,” his mother shot back.
He smiled. He needed this—the normalcy and routine. He needed a few hours of no drama, no work and no distractions—
“Bianca’s here,” Zach called as he hurtled out the back gate and headed toward the street.
Patton looked through the gate to see Cady’s little gray sports car parking along the curb. His hand tightened on the spatula, and his chest felt heavy.
“Is that Cady’s car?” his mother asked. “Spence, go get her. We need to put some meat on that girl’s bones.” She walked over to Patton, watching Spence head toward the gate. “I think Cady might just hit it off with your brother. What do you think?”
It was a good thing his mother was staring after Spence, otherwise she’d pick up on his disposition. He’d been in decent spirits—almost chipper. But now that he was thinking about Spence and Cady, his mood took a nosedive. He speared one of the hot dogs with too much force, knocking it off the grill and onto the grass. Mikey snapped it up in a heartbeat.
“Who’s Cady?” Lucy perked up.
Patton glanced at her. Great, she’d seen his little outburst. He had no doubt his cousin, the psychiatrist for Greyson Police Department, was analyzing the shit out of him. He glared at her as she hopped up and headed to the fence to join his mother. He sighed.