“I don’t have any plans,” Candace says wearily. “But whatever they were going to be, I already expected that I would have to leave people behind. That’s what happens when you become an adult, Dad. You have to move on.”
“But it’s not moving on for him,” Dad says. “What does he have to give up? Nothing!”
“That’s not true,” I say, finally managing to get a word in. “It’s not just a fling for me. I’ve never had a fling in my life, Bill. I’m serious about this.”
“And we’re just going to take your word for it, are we?” Bill snaps, a little more of the fire back in his voice.
This is it. This is where I can make a difference and make him see. It looks like he’s even starting to come around already, thanks to Candace’s declaration. I don’t think he believes anymore that I’ve been grooming her if he even really did in the first place. And now, what? Does he just think it’s puppy love?
“You don’t have to take my word for it,” I say. I reach for Candace’s hand again, and this time she doesn’t pull away. But the look on her face, like she’s allowing herself one last hit of something she has to give up forever, is enough to almost rip my heart in half. “You can watch me. I’m going to put my money where my mouth is. You may not trust me now, but you will. You’ll see how much I care for her. How serious I am about wanting to be together for the rest of our lives.”
I feel Candace’s hand tighten on mine. But I know I already have her. It’s not her I need to convince.
“So I’m supposed to just sit back and watch you ruin her life and break her heart, while we wait for some miraculous sign to come?” Bill says. “You must think I was born yesterday.”
“No, I don’t,” I say. And I hesitate, looking at Candace for this part. “I mean to start right now. I’m asking Candace to move in with me so that we can give this relationship a real shot.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Candace
I could have easily predicted the way that Dad explodes at Sean’s last statement. The idea that he’s going to lose his baby girl was never going to sit well with him, and right now is not the best time for him to get that news.
But it’s like I tried to explain to him earlier. It doesn’t matter. I’m an adult now. I’ve graduated college. I need to look for work, and that might mean moving anyway. I’m definitely going to be looking to get my own apartment, no matter what.
I’m not going to be his little girl sitting at home anymore. It doesn’t make a difference if I move out alone, or in with Sean. He just can’t see that.
“Oh, that just sounds perfect,” Dad exclaims his voice heavy with sarcasm. “Such a commitment – asking someone to move into a house that you’re not even at for most of the year. And on her own, away from all of her friends and family, too.”
“I don’t care,” I start, but Sean holds up a hand and cuts me off. I stop, waiting to hear what he has to say.
I wish we’d had the chance to do this in a more romantic setting. To discuss it with love, over a delicious dinner, or while sitting together and watching the sunset. Talking about the rest of our lives together. Instead, Dad is forcing us to do it here in front of him, in the middle of an argument. But I hear it all the same, and it makes my heart trip in my chest. Me and Sean, living together. I squeeze his hand harder so he knows that I’m on board.
How could I not be? For everything I said earlier, I don’t even know that I would be able to leave him. Not without killing off such a huge part of myself that it wouldn’t be worth it.
“You don’t seem to understand, Bill,” he says. “Maybe it’s because you keep jumping to conclusions before you let me fully explain.”
There’s a sneer on my dad’s face. “Go on, then. Explain yourself. Tell me how it’s going to be alright because my little girl thinks she won’t mind being alone for most of the year. Even though she’s never been alone before, not like that. Not enough to know how awful it would be, how lonely.”
“She won’t be lonely,” I say. “Because she won’t be away from her family.”
“Oh, don’t give me that,” Dad scoffs. “You live all the way in—”
“Dad,” I interrupt because there’s a look on Sean’s face that makes me think I really, really want to hear what he has to say. “Let him finish. Why won’t I be away from my family?”