“Okay, now you’re scaring me. You aren’t going to kiss me or anything, are you?”
Carl snorted and punched the shoulder he had patted before. “You always were a smart ass.”
Jackson grinned, relieved that Carl sounded more like himself now. He very much needed some things in his life to be normal again.
By Thursday, Laurel wasn’t sure whether Jackson was trying too hard to pretend everything was normal in his life, or working like a demon because he was worried about the medical bills that were piling up during Tyler’s hospitalization. He had definitely fallen into his old routines, the only difference being that he now came to the hospital after a ten-hour workday rather than going straight home.
To give him credit, he did call a couple of times each day to check on Tyler and ask if Laurel needed anything. And he didn’t work as late as he’d been known to in the past, since he was making an effort to be at the hospital before Tyler was down for the night.
Laurel thought of all the days when he had left before Tyler woke in the morning and returned after the boy was asleep. Some of the things Jackson had said during the past few days made her suspect he was thinking the same things too. He made a point to read a book or play a game with Tyler every evening after he arrived at the hospital.
She wondered if that new attitude would survive after Tyler was released. How long would it be until Laurel and Tyler were alone in their house again, waiting for Jackson to take time away from his work to spend with them? When he did come home, he would usually bring stacks of specifications and projections and reports and barricade himself into his home office to pore over them until long after Tyler and Laurel were asleep.
She and Jackson hadn’t been alone together since they’d gone home to rest Sunday afternoon. Occasionally she thought she detected the memory of that interlude in his eyes when he looked at her. Maybe he was paying a bit more attention to her opinions? But being on his best behavior while Tyler was in the hospital wasn’t necessarily a precursor of major changes in their relationship, she reminded herself. It would be so easy for him—for both of them, she added ruefully—to fall into their old habits of going their own ways, living two separate lives beneath the same roof.
Their relationship hadn’t been enough to satisfy her before. She knew full well it hadn’t satisfied him, either. More than once during the past year she had wondered if she would be doing him a favor to free him to pursue a woman who was more what he needed. One who didn’t bear so many insecurities from childhood. One who would be content to be Mrs. Jackson Reiss and nothing more.
She had told herself when those thoughts had occurred to her in the past that she stayed primarily for Tyler’s sake. But deep inside, she knew there was more to it than that. She stayed with Jackson because she had fallen desperately in love with him on that night four years ago, and though many of her perceptions of him had changed since, her love for him had not.
Perhaps she had clung to a fleeting hope that one day he would realize she was exactly what he wanted from a wife even if she didn’t—couldn’t—be the type of wife he had always envisioned.
No matter his expectation, Laurel couldn’t change who she was. Though she didn’t resent one minute of the time she spent with Tyler now, there would come a day soon when she would need to go back to work. Already she missed her job—her clients, her co-workers, the emotional rewards she received from helping childless couples.
There was another difference between herself and Jackson, she mused as she sat in Tyler’s room with an unopened book in her lap, waiting for the doctor to make his daily rounds. Laurel worked because she loved her job. Jackson worked for the paycheck.
Although he was interested in the construction industry, he often found it frustrating to be so restricted by the demands and expectations of his overly critical and sometimes unreasonable employer. He had once admitted to Laurel that his dream would be to have his own construction business, a goal that seemed completely out of reach for now.
Though he was careful to save a portion of his earnings, this son of a mechanic and a former waitress lacked the connections and the capital to start up a business. And since social work was hardly a career one entered to get wealthy, he didn’t consider Laurel’s income sufficient to support the three of them while he took a huge financial risk.
One of Laurel’s favorite LPNs, a short, comfortably rounded woman of American Indian descent, entered the room with her usual bright smile, carrying a tray that held a carton of juice and a container of orange sherbet. “I thought you might enjoy a little snack this afternoon, Tyler.”
Because Tyler’s appetite still hadn’t returned, Laurel was pleased when he looked up from his toys with a show of interest. “Ice cream?”
“Close enough,” Camilla replied, setting the juice and sherbet on the bed tray. “You can have it as soon as I take your temperature, okay?”
Tyler submitted patiently to having a digital thermometer placed in his ear. Camilla made a note of that reading, which she informed Laurel was normal, then listened to his heart through a stethoscope.
“Everything looks good,” she said, looping the stethoscope around the neck of her cartoon-character-decorated scrubs. She rolled the bed tray into position for Tyler and helped him open his sherbet and juice. The despised IV needle was gone now, so Tyler was unimpeded as he dug into the treat eagerly.
Camilla turned to Laurel. “How are you, Mrs. Reiss?”
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“Fine, thank you.”
“Do you have any questions I can answer? I have a few spare minutes.”
“Not just now. I’m still waiting for Dr. Rutledge to come by. He’s usually here by now.”
“I believe he’s running behind today. I heard he had an emergency surgery this morning. Has your regular pediatrician been by yet?”
“This morning. We talked about Tyler’s follow-up care. It sounds as though he should be back to normal very quickly.”
“You’ll be surprised how fast he rebounds. Kids are just amazing in their resiliency.”
Laurel laughed a bit ruefully. “He’ll probably recover before I do. He seems to be taking everything in stride, while I obsess about every little thing.”
Camilla made a sympathetic face. “I know. We often tell parents that their children will hardly remember anything of their hospital ordeal, but the parents will recall every tiny detail for the rest of their lives.”