I shot up from my chair, stunned by my mother, who seemed more like a stranger with each passing day. No! I pounded my hands against the table. I pounded over and over again until my hands started turning red, and then I kept pounding.
“Brooks, you leave, too. You and I already spoke, and I think I made my message pretty clear. Maggie, go to your room.”
No! No!
Brooks lowered his head and left. Mrs. Boone stood up and shook her head. “This isn’t right, Katie. Those kids…they are helping each other.”
“No offense, Mrs. Boone, but Maggie is not your child, and I’d prefer if you’d stop treating her as if she is your responsibility. She’s not Jessica and you do not get to make these choices for her. I refuse to let my daughter end up like—”
“Like what?” Mrs. Boone barked back, obviously deeply offended. She grabbed her purse and gripped it tightly in her hold. “Like my daughter?”
A glimpse of guilt appeared in Mama’s eyes before she blinked. “From this point on, there will be no more afternoon teas. I appreciate you spending time with Maggie, Mrs. Boone, I really do, but that will be all.”
As Mrs. Boone walked to the front door, Mama followed her, and I stayed right on their heels. “I get what you’re trying to do, Katie. I really do. I tried to do it with my daughter, too. You think you’re helping her by keeping her away from the world, from the place that hurt her, but you’re not. You’re suffocating her. You’re drowning out the little voice she has—her freedom of choice. Her choice to love, to open herself up. You’re stealing that from
her.”
Mama’s head lowered. “Goodbye, Mrs. Boone.”
She had sent my boyfriend and my best friend away from me, and I couldn’t understand what I’d done to deserve it. I started pounding against the closest wall to get Mama’s attention. See me. Notice me!
She turned, unmoved by my sounds. “Go to your room, Maggie.”
No. I pounded more and more, and she charged at me, wrapping her arms around me. No!
“Stop it,” she ordered. “You think about the kind of life you’d give Brooks. Do you really want him to give up his dreams to stay here with you? How do you think you could be in a relationship with him when he’s traveling the world, making a life for himself? Why would you do that to him? This isn’t right for you, or him. He deserves more than dates in this house. You deserve to be alone so you can get fixed.”
Get fixed?
What if I wasn’t broken? What if this was just me?
Where was Daddy? I needed him to come home. I needed him to try to make sense of Mama’s mind. I needed him to fix this. I kept struggling in her hold as she dragged me up the stairs. “This is for your own good, Maggie. I’m sorry, but this is for your own good.”
I resisted, but she wouldn’t let me go. She wouldn’t let me free. I blinked my eyes and saw him. The devil.
He apologized for hurting me, apologized for pushing a few fingers into the side of my neck, making it harder and harder for me to find my next breaths.
“Mom! Let her go!” Calvin said, coming out of his room. He tried to get Mama off of me, but she shoved him away.
“Stay out of this, Calvin. Your sister is fine.”
No, I’m not. You’re hurting me.
Cheryl came out, and I saw the fear in her eyes. I was certain she saw it in my stare too.
Help me.
“Mom,” she started, but Mama shut her up quick, too.
She dragged me to my room and shoved me inside. With haste, she shut the door, then held it closed from the outside. “You’ll see, Maggie. I’m doing this for you. I’m protecting you.”
What was wrong with her? Why was she acting so insane? I pounded on the door, trying my best to open it, but it wouldn’t budge. I shoved my body against it, over and over again. Let me out! Let me out! My hands wrapped around my neck, and I could feel him there with me. He was choking me; he was going to kill me. Let me out, let me out!
I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t breathe…I didn’t know what other option I had.
I didn’t know what else I could do, so I did the only thing that came to mind.
I fell to the floor.