As she did, I smiled at her, and she smiled at me. A lot of smiling happened and a lot of talking, too. “You know, I’ve always wanted another daughter,” she said, brushing my hair.
I didn’t say it, but I had always wanted a mama, too.
“We’re going to have so much fun together, Maggie. You, Cheryl, and me. We can get our nails done, and go sit down by the pool, and drink lemonade, and flip through magazines. We can do everything guys hate doing.”
She hugged me goodnight, then she left and shut off the light.
I didn’t sleep at all.
I tossed, turned, and whimpered for a long time, but Daddy couldn’t hear me because he was all the way on the first floor, sleeping in his bedroom with Katie. Even if I wanted to go find him, I couldn’t, because the hallway was dark, and I hated dark places more than anything. I sniffled a bit, trying my best to count sheep in my head, but nothing was working.
“What’s the matter with you?” a shadowy figure standing in my doorway said.
I gasped and sat up straight, hugging my pillow.
The shadow moved closer, and I let out a small sigh when I saw it was Brooks. His hair was wild and standing up on his head, and he had sleep wrinkles on his cheek. “You gotta stop crying. You keep waking me up.”
I sniffled. “Sorry.”
“What’s the matter, anyway? You homesick or somethin’?”
“No.”
“Then what is it?”
I lowered my head, embarrassed. “I’m scared of the dark.”
“Oh.” He narrowed his eyes for a second before leaving the room.
I kept hugging my pillow, and I was even more surprised when Brooks came back. He had something in his hand and walked over to the wall to plug it in. “Calvin doesn’t need a nightlight. His mom just put it in his room.” He arched an eyebrow. “Is that better?”
I nodded. Better.
He yawned. “Okay, well, night…er…what’s your name again?”
“Maggie.”
“Night, Maggie. You don’t really gotta worry ’bout nothing here in our town, either. It’s always safe. You’re safe here. And if that ain’t better, I’m sure you can come sleep on Calvin’s floor. He won’t mind.” He left, scratching his messy hair and still yawning.
My eyes fell to the nightlight shaped like a rocket ship just before they started to close. I felt tired. I felt safe. I felt protected by a rocket ship given to me by a boy I’d just met.
Before, I wasn’t sure, but this time I knew.
Daddy was right.
“Forever,” I whispered to myself, falling deeper and deeper into my dreams. “This time is forever.”
July 25th, 2008 — Ten Years Old
A note to the boy who’s in love with me
By: Maggie May Riley
Dear Brooks Tyler,
I spent a lot of time upset with you the other day after you called me a name and pushed me into a puddle. You ruined my favorite dress and my pink and yellow sandals. I was so made mad at you for pushing me.
Your brother Jamie told me you’re mean to me because you love me. You call me names because that’s what boys do when they are in love. You pushed me only because you wanted to be close to me. I think that’s stiupid stupid, but I also know that my mama says all men are stupid, so it’s not your fault. It’s in your DNA.