“Hi, Uncle Jude,” Lexi greets without preamble, and I spin around to greet her in her position directly behind me.
“Hey-o, Lexinator. How’s it hanging?” I take her backpack and sling it over my shoulder.
Lexi’s eyebrows draw together as she smirks. “This is another one of those weird things you say that I don’t understand, isn’t it, Uncle Jude?”
I laugh. My niece is the smartest person I know, but she’s pretty damn funny too. No one straight-talks me quite as fiercely as she does, and I have to admit, it makes me enjoy the time we spend together even more.
“Yes, I guess it is. How was Mathletes practice? Did you ace everything?”
“Of course. I’m an expert in math.”
I laugh again. Damn, I love how her brain works. She never even considers belittling herself for the sake of others, and in today’s world, I feel like that’s a godsend for a little girl. So many societal constraints and voices would tell her to be humble or not to brag, but I’m fucking here for it.
I hope she keeps it up until the day I die and beyond.
“Damn straight, girlfriend. Most of us wish we could do only half the stuff you can.”
“I could teach you.”
I smile. “I bet you could, baby girl. Probably not without a lot of frustration, though. Your dear uncle Jude excels much more at other things.”
“Like chasing tail?”
I cough on my saliva, choking around it while I try to find some air. “Where did you hear that?”
She shrugs nonchalantly. “I don’t know what it means, but Uncle Remy and Uncle Flynn talk about it all the time.”
“They do, do they?”
She nods. “Yes.”
“What else do those bast—brothers of mine have to say?”
“Not much else about you. They say Uncle Ty is a serial polygamist. Which I learned about on TV, but I’m not really sure how it relates to Uncle Ty unless he’s got wives I don’t know about.”
I nearly snort. “Does your mom know you’ve heard Uncle Rem and Uncle Flynn talking about this stuff?”
Lexi shrugs. “It hasn’t come up.”
I smirk. Oh man. Sounds like Jude is about to be the favorite brother pretty soon.
“Well, no matter what Rem and Flynn say, everyone has the right to be whatever kind of person they want to be. Especially since those two don’t have a whole lot of room to talk.”
Lexi sighs. “Uncle Flynn doesn’t talk that much anyway.”
I laugh. “No, you’re right. He doesn’t. And that’s fine too.”
“Okay.”
I nod, first to her and then to myself. I’m not an expert in childcare, but I think I do all right with my niece. And as a bonus, living the life I do, I get to take her to dinner, have a good time without worrying too much about teaching her life lessons and shit, and then drop her off with her parents so I can go home to peace and quiet. It’s pretty much the perfect arrangement, being an uncle.
Now I just have to plan a strategy to secure the favorite uncle position, effectively robbing it from Remy.
“Where do you want to eat, kiddo? Somewhere casual or fancy?”
Lexi ponders for a moment, answering, “Fancy. We deserve to treat ourselves every once in a while.”
“Hell yes, we do,” I agree, succinctly considering our options while looking up and down the block from Lexi’s school. We’re Uptown already, but that’s no big deal. We can easily take a cab or ride the subway if we need to.
“Do you feel like Italian or a nice juicy steak?” I ask in an effort to narrow it down.
“Spaghetti,” she says excitedly. “Definitely spaghetti.”
This kid could eat spaghetti every day for the rest of her life and still not have enough spaghetti.
“Mm-hmm,” I hum. “I had a feeling.” Reaching out and wrapping my forearm around her shoulders, I guide her to the left and head straight for the subway station on the next block. “Little Italy, it is, then.”
Lexi smiles, counting off the buildings as we walk and giving me a tally at the end of the block while we wait to cross the street. “There are fifteen buildings between this side of the street and the other. Typically, a city block consists of somewhere around twenty or twenty-five buildings, but since my school is a part of this one, it’s fewer.”
I nod. “That makes sense.”
“How many buildings are on your block?”
I have to laugh. “You know, kiddo, I’ve never checked.”
“You should.”
“You’re right,” I agree, ushering her in front of me and holding on to both shoulders as we pass through a large crowd of people cluttering the entire sidewalk. “Or maybe next time you’re over, you can count them for me.”
She nods. “When’s the next time I’ll be over?”
“I’m not sure, but I’ll check with your parents.”
“Will it be soon?”
“I’ll make sure it is,” I say confidently. The thing is, I know, for Lexi, that this question in her mind won’t just disappear. It’ll be the first thing she asks me about the next time she sees me, and at least part of the thoughts she has daily. With the way her extraordinary brain works, it’s not acceptable for a question to go unanswered forever.