Cara didn’t register his words for a minute. His eyes were burning into hers. Something in his stance made her want to stand and run, but she stayed sitting and watched as he pulled a chair up and sat down opposite her. He took her hands, and she could feel his shaking.
Vicenzo looked down for a second before bringing his head back up, his eyes intense. ‘Yesterday, when I got home and you were gone…and when I found out where you were…that you’d driven. When I saw you at the side of the road I think I aged a few decades in the space of half an hour. All I could imagine was you lying somewhere at the bottom of a ravine.’ He’d gone pale again.
‘But I’m fine,’ Cara pointed out.
‘I know. But the truth is it made me finally face up to something. From the start I put you in a place where I thought I had you all figured out as someone evil and manipulative. A gold-digger. But it was ridiculous. You had no idea who I was that night in London, and yet I told myself you’d gone to bed with me because I was obviously rich…’
He shook his head. ‘All the concepts I had about you slowly but surely started to crumble. And far earlier than I was prepared to admit. It was the way you signed the prenuptial agreement without turning a hair.’ He smiled faintly. ‘The way you bonded with my father; your determination to wear black. And the night of your birthday, which was a total disaster.’
She made a protesting noise but his hands gripped hers tighter. ‘It was. And then there was—’ He broke off for a moment, and when he spoke again his voice sounded rough, his accent more pronounced. ‘The miscarriage… We lost a baby because of my sheer bloody-mindedness.’
Cara was starting to feel slightly breathless and panicky. ‘Vicenzo, you can’t say that—don’t think that. It wasn’t your fault.’
A look of unmistakable pain crossed his face. ‘I have to let you go, Cara. I can’t keep you here and I should never have brought you here. I’m so sorry that I brought even more heartache into your life…the baby.’
Cara couldn’t breathe. She pulled her hands from Vicenzo’s and stood up. She knew rationally she should be rejoicing, but she felt as if she was dying. She backed away behind the chair. And in her pathetic weakness she latched onto something.
‘But the debt. I still owe Cormac’s debt.’
Vicenzo stood too, arms by his sides. ‘The debt is gone. Paid.’
She shook her head, twisting her hands. ‘No. I won’t allow you to cover for him.’
Vicenzo was shaking his head too. ‘It’s gone, Cara. It doesn’t exist any more—nowhere, not even on paper. You were as much a victim of your brother as my sister was. I’m doing this for you, and in her memory. She wouldn’t want that for you and neither do I.’
‘But…’ She struggled to take in the enormity of the fact that he wanted her to go, and the fact that she couldn’t feel happy at the prospect of her freedom.
Then, as if reading her mind, Vicenzo said, ‘You have your freedom now, Cara. You can go home, look for work. I’ve already made arrangements to buy you an apartment in Dublin to help you get started. I can secure you a job too.’
Bile rose in Cara’s throat. ‘No. You don’t have to do that.’ The thought of him setting her up was too much. Tears stung her eyes and she blinked them back furiously.
He nodded. ‘Yes I do.’
A curious stillness came into the room around them. It made Cara hold her tongue.
And then Vicenzo said quietly, holding her gaze, ‘It’s the least I can do for the woman I love, who I’ve hurt so much.’
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CARA’S heart stopped. Time stood still. ‘What did you say?’
Vicenzo was as still as a statue. ‘I said that it’s the least I can do for the w
oman I love.’
‘You don’t…’ Cara was shaking her head, feeling as if the whole world was starting to crumble around her.
‘I do. I’ve fallen in love with you. I nearly fell apart yesterday. Within two months of looking into your eyes for the first time all my precious defences were shot to pieces. I had a ring on your finger and you locked away as my pregnant bride.’
‘But that was just because of the baby, the press…’ Cara breathed. She couldn’t believe it. She simply couldn’t believe it. She had to reiterate what she knew to be true. Wasn’t it?
Vicenzo smiled tightly and read her mind. ‘Was it? From the moment I walked away from you that morning I couldn’t get you out of my head. I would have found some excuse to go back to you.’ His smile faded. ‘I have no right to keep you here when all you’ve ever wanted and deserved is your freedom. I will not be a tyrant and keep you trapped like your brother did to you in London, by denying you your economic freedom. You have the power in your hands to exact the worst vengeance on me, Cara…if you walk away.’
His mouth twisted. ‘I just thought it only fair to tell you—so that it can give you some measure of satisfaction. But if you could find it in your heart to stay and give this marriage a chance then…you would make me the happiest man alive. I don’t delude myself for a second to think that you could possibly love me after everything I’ve put you through.’
Everything they’d been through seemed to flash through Cara’s mind, like her life flashing before her eyes. She searched his face for some sign…but he was holding himself so rigidly. If he was to stride over to her and take her into his arms then she might believe…but it was too much.
She didn’t doubt that he felt guilty about the baby, was blaming himself for doubting her. But how could she survive going into his arms now, only to have him tire of her after a few weeks or months and seek to get the marriage dissolved when the novelty wore off? He’d been a playboy until he met her. They’d simply gone through an extraordinarily dramatic set of circumstances and suffered mutual loss and grief.