I follow his advice and making a beeline for the front door, I can’t help but feel like I’ve been here before.
I wonder if dad brought me here when I was little, too little to remember.
Or is it just that I know home when I see it?
I want to look through the whole place, which looks like it hasn’t seen any storm damage, but I can’t help but overhear Ben’s voice from his truck and wonder who he could be in a heated conversation with now.
I know it’s not my dad, but I can’t help but worry, feeling guilty again that he’s cutting his regular schedule short just so he can spend more time with me.
I don’t mean to eavesdrop, but I work my way back to Ben’s truck, hearing him in a heated debate with a man I figure out quickly is his boss.
“Jesus, Ben. We’ve had a hurricane and you want to up and tail it to your ranch? I need you at the station, ready for anything…” I hear clearly.
Ben doesn’t see me, but I can tell he’s torn by the look on his face, the straining of his huge hand against the radio.
“I’m on duty, sir. Just taking some time to check on my own property, there have been zero casualties or even assistance requests. On my day off too, I might add,” he snarls.
There’s a long pause before the real reason comes out.
“I understand you have a driver rescued from her car in your care? A family friend, the sheriff’s office tells me,” His boss says, making Ben lose his temper for the first time that I’ve seen.
“If that’s an issue then fire me, asshole. No! I quit, you can stick your Ranger station where it fits,” he growls again before flicking off the radio, getting out of the truck, and running his hands through his hair before he spots me.
I rush over to him, and he’s not unhappy to see me.
“How’d it go?” he asks, forcing cheerfulness. “Like it?”
“Oh Ben,” I gasp. “Don’t do anything stupid because of me. Don’t give up your job just because I’m here,” I beg him, knowing how important it is to him.
Knowing how hard it is to get a job like he has, no matter how much property he has to support himself.
“I couldn’t forgive myself if you gave up your career because of me,” I add desperately.
But he only shakes his head and slowly starts to smile, puffing out all his anger in one breath as he watches me speak.
“I told you already, Stacey. I’d give all of this up if it meant I could have you for just one more day. For one more minute,” he explains.
His cell chimes and I know, we both know who it is.
“Answer it, please?” I implore, letting him hug me close for a moment, leaning down to kiss me before he agrees with a mock growl of annoyance.
He takes the call, and from what I can tell after a short and quiet conversation, he’s reached some sort of agreement with his boss.
“I have the rest of my weekend to myself,” he says with some satisfaction, but adds, “I could really give it all up, Stacey. Been thinking about it lately anyway,” he muses.
“Just don’t throw it away because of me,” I remind him again, letting him take my hand in his as we easily forget about it all as he starts to show me around.
I smile, almost choking with emotion though.
Ben’s not introducing the place as his, but ours.
“And here, we could have a....,” he says excitedly. “And over there…”
I know in a minute that the whole visit here is for my benefit and that Ben wants a home, not just an empty ranch.
A home with someone he can share it with. And, most likely, a family too.
“It’s a lot to take in,” he says, holding me by the arms again, beaming as he looks down at me with affection.
“I just want you to be happy. I just want us to be happy, forever,” he says.
I do too, but we both know one thing, the only thing that stands before all that.
Even though he’s probably the most unassuming guy? My dad is my best friend too, and I know how much he loves Ben.
What’s happened between us? It’ll cut him to the quick, and we all know it.
My dad least of all, but somehow a part of me senses that’s why he’s coming up here.
If he doesn’t hear it from Ben’s own lips, it could never be real.
But at least we have one night together, don’t we?
I try to tell myself that as Ben shows me around.
I can already see myself stoking wood stoves, feeding fireplaces, and collecting eggs from hens that aren’t here.
Not yet.
Riding ponies with our kids, pulling husks back from ears of our own corn before Ben barbecues them, and sipping spring water from our own well. Enjoying a family meal from all the ingredients from our own farm.