Taking a deep breath, she huffs out, “Twenty-two.”
Damn. I figured a couple years older. It doesn’t change my mind about her, though. She’s still going to be mine. “You’ve never had a serious boyfriend?” I use the term loosely. I’m anything but a boy, and what I’m feeling for her is all manly.
“Well, not really, no.”
“What does not really mean?”
“I had a boyfriend in high school, but I don’t think those are ever serious.” She frowns again, and I want to smooth out the wrinkles in her forehead.
“I suppose not.” I’m not exactly fond of hearing that she has had any boyfriends. “How long have you been a teacher?” It can’t possibly have been very long.
“This was my first year. I got quite lucky landing my own class right out the gate.” Her voice is full of pride, and so it should be. Hell, I’m proud of her. Teaching isn’t an easy gig.
“What are you worried about here, Marina?”
She goes quiet.
“I don’t know how any of this works.” Her body turns to face at me. “I mean, I’m leaving next week for a few weeks, and we’re starting something here. How do we know it’ll still be here when I get back?”
I can hear the stress in her words. Thankfully, we’re at the retro diner I’ve chosen for dinner, and I can put the truck in park to concentrate on her. Gripping her neck in both of my hands, I tell her honestly, “I’ve dated a few women on and off over the years.” She looks away, not appreciating hearing about my conquests any more than I want to hear about hers. “But not once, have I felt for them what I’m beginning to feel for you. They never consumed me the way you do. They didn’t have me wanting to be around them just for the sake of spending time with them. For you, Marina, I’ll wait until the end of time to get my chance with you. You’re it for me, baby, and I think I’m it for you, too. You’re just scared.” A lone tear slides down her cheek to catch on her slow smiling lips. “There’s my good girl,” I say leaning to kiss her teardrop away.
Marina
How does he always know what to say? If not for the sincerity in his voice and gaze, I’d think he rehearsed these lines. But it’s all there for me to see. Arsen holds nothing back in expressing his intentions with me.
He both eases my fears and creates new ones. Telling him about the
accident is my biggest problem. Without that obstacle, I believe I’d dive head first into this thing with him. I would never let him go. Except it is there, sitting like a sour egg between us.
Every time I try to form the words, they lodge in my throat, and I can’t get them out. I can’t bring myself to do it. Which is unfair to us both. Because if he can’t live with the life I’ve been dealt and we fall in love, make plans for the future, and then decides he wants more, we’ll both be left shattered.
I don’t want to cause him pain, but I don’t want to suffer my own either. Rejection is something I’ve never handled well. It’s why I avoid confrontation and strive to do my best at everything.
If I’m perfect, there’s no reason to be rejected, right?
Wrong.
Because now, I’m flawed and seriously driving myself crazy, spinning in circles with my thoughts.
As we’re seated at a partial booth that looks like it came straight out of Grease, my eyes are glued to Arsen. Watching the way he maneuvers his hulking body into the small chair across from me is amusing. It looks like it could break under his weight at any moment.
“Did they think only kids would sit in these things or what?” he grumbles.
“You could sit here. With me,” I tell him, boldly.
His stare shoots to mine, and I see a slow burn building in his burnished amber depths. He doesn’t even hesitate at my invitation. Sliding in beside me, he wraps one arm across the back of the bench while opening a single menu for us to peruse together on the table.
His wide shoulders engulf me as he leans closer, and I get a hint of a woodsy scent wafting off him. Closing my eyes, I inhale, feeling him move closer. I stay right where I am. When his hand cups my chin, my head tilts into his warm palm.
“So beautiful,” he murmurs. I can feel his breath against my lips as he lowers his head. The first gentle graze of his tongue over my lips makes me breathless, and my mouth opens, allowing him entrance to my depths.
The kiss is slow, melting. It burns most sweetly. He covets the action like it’ll be his last, and I do the same. His thumb soothes over my cheek as he sucks on my tongue gently. A shiver works through me, forcing a moan past my lips and into his mouth.
He freezes ever so slightly before delving deeper, seducing me into a new realm. Lights burst behind my closed eyelids as his other hand glides down my back, settling on my hip and waist. He’s so big everywhere that he seriously blocks out the rest of the world.
I love it.
I feel protected. Cared for. Something I haven’t experienced in far too long. I yearn for more. I crave more of him.