No. Wait.
My Tula is pure of heart. She gave herself to me out of love. Not because of the man on the outside, but for the man I’ve become on the inside: loyal, caring, protective.
Zac raised his awesomely scruffy, unshaved chin. A sign of his virility. Full-beard grower here. “Deal. So now what? I can wear a costume. How about I dress like a roadkill technician?”
“No need for costumes. I’ll provide another body.”
“No.” Zac knew this was a trick.
“Take it or leave it, God of Temptation. Unless your stomach can’t handle such a challenge? In which case, I’ll be sure that Tula’s time on Earth ends in some unfortunate accident so she can be here with me.”
Meaning that Maury would do something or manipulate someone to trigger an event that would kill his precious Tula. A body wasn’t needed to scare a person into a car wreck or take a distracted step in front of a moving train. Tula could die and become Maury’s prey.
Maury had Zac by the man-coconuts. Everything on the line.
Zac glared at the evil demon. “And how do you propose I take this other form?”
Maury winked. “I have my ways.”
CHAPTER THREE
Maury laughed on the inside as he watched Zac’s expression turn from rancid to downright livid. Zac might have been right about certain things—such as how Maury planned to take over the human world—but the arrogant deity was entirely wrong about everything else.
So, so wrong. Even better, Zac had fallen right into Maury’s trap. And I’m just getting started, my friend. Maury wasn’t simply going to take Zac’s woman; he planned to destroy all the gods, one at a time, by taking away everything they loved. He would chip away at them, like a cancer of the soul. This first step is going to be hilarious.
Maury snapped his fingers. “Hilbert!” After a few moments, a hideous, four-foot-tall demon appeared. One dark eye was larger than the other, and his bulbous forehead was filled with pits. “Zac, meet Hilbert. He is going to loan you his body for this challenge.”
Zac’s eyes widened with disgust. “Whoa, whoa, my friend. Now you’re playing unfair. I couldn’t seduce a shit-covered flea with that body. No offense, Hilbert.” Zac jerked his head toward Hilbert, who tried to bob his head in response.
Unfortunately, Hilbert had no neck. Just a head attached to a set of shoulders, followed by a squatty, dumpy frame that included legs like wadded-up marshmallows. Hilbert was hideous.
Ah…but his dry humor is unequaled. Maury waited patiently for Hilbert’s rebuttal. Also, he wondered if Zac realized that Maury wasn’t alone in his escape from the demon realm. Several were already here in the underworld, with more on the way.
But here was the biggest kicker of all: Maury did not require help getting into the human world. He merely wanted Zac to believe it was an obstacle to throw the gods off his tracks. The big picture was bigger than anyone could imagine. What I have planned will blow their minds.
“It is true, Zac,” said Hilbert, “you could not seduce a shit-covered flea with this body, because you lack my charisma. Without your looks, you are nothing but a shallow, feckless man whore. You couldn’t charm the condom off a flaccid dick.”
“Good one, Hilbert.” Maury high-fived his little demon soldier.
Zac glared at Hilbert with his deific turquoise eyes. “You think you’re so smart, demon-pug?”
“I’m not the one chained to a wall, so yeah.” Hilbert grinned, displaying a set of greenish-brown teeth covered in slime.
“Enough with the pleasantries, gentlemen,” Maury said. “Time to get down to business. In the interest of making this a fair fight, here are the rules. Zac, you cannot use any of your powers nor disclose your true identity to anyone. Even if they guess it is you, you must deny it until the end of the challenge. You will have two weeks in Maury’s body to woo Tula with your personality, and by woo, you must get her to kiss you. Full tongue. Romantic kiss.”
“Fine. But how does this resolve your issue? Everyone will still see you’re handicapping me. You’ll still look like a coward—afraid to compete with all this awesomeness that is Zac, God of Temptation.”
This guy and his ego puts us demons to shame. “Win or lose, I will return your body after your two weeks are over. Tula will once again be able to interact with you in your true form. However, if you have failed the challenge, you must agree to not stand in my way while I pursue her. In the end, you will have no doubts about her feelings for you when she chooses me.”
Maury could see the doubt spinning behind Zac’s abhorrent turquoise eyes.
Time for a little push. “Of course, you are free to turn down the challenge, which I fully understand. I mean, what man wants to find out the love of his life is with him only for his body and that their connection isn’t real?”