Bryn and Laney shake their head simultaneously, except Bryn’s moves from side to side while Laney nods up and down.
“But I’m more interested in how Gia hooking up with Mav would affect any of us, Jo. Bryn’s disgusted by the guy, so unless it’s Mav you’re interested in and not…”
“No, Laney. That’s not it at all.” It’s not my business, maybe… “This isn’t my business, and maybe I’m way off base here, but I think Madden might have a little crush on Gia.” Laney laughs, and Bryn gasps in shock. “I could be wrong, but judging from the way he goes stock-still and falls over his words when she speaks to him. I don’t know.” I shrug.
“You’re delusional, Jo,” Laney scoffs, and she looks pissed.
“I didn’t say it was fact, Lan. Just a feeling I have.”
“I agree with Laney on this one, Jo. I’ve seen the way Madden looks at you, and I’ve seen the way he looks at Gia. I’d bet $500 right now that you’re his main crush.”
Here we go again.
“Ooookay, let’s forget that I said anything.”
Bryn looks at Laney then at me, her mouth quirking to the side like she’s wanting to say something but really isn’t sure how to say it.
“Ya know, I’m not just your friend, Jo. Madden is like a big brother to me, and when I see the two of you together, I can feel the electricity that singes between you, the sparks that fly, and I…” Laney laughs to herself, looking out at the ocean. “I actually get jealous.” She looks between Bryn and me, and the hurt in Laney’s eyes is surprising. “You don’t see how Madden looks at you, how his eyes light up when he talks about you. I know you’re scared of getting hurt, but Madden is a safe bet, and I’m not even a gambler.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
MADDEN
Do not look at her ass, do not look at her ass. I keep repeating that to myself, but it’s doing absolutely no fuckin’ good. Jordan leads me toward the left side of the gym where Bryn’s yoga studio is housed. I’ve only been over to this area a couple times, and I know shit about yoga, but I figure my hot ass trainer won’t lead me astray. Mav mentioned something about a yoga class last week, and all us guys gave him absolute hell over it. Which means today—this right here, what I’m getting ready to do—has to stay between Jordan and me.
“I don’t know why I didn’t think of this before.” Jordan grins because she knows I’m not excited about this. “Yoga relaxes the mind and soul. I use it often when I’m feeling anxious.”
“I’m not bending like a pretzel or sticking my ass up in the air, Jordan.” She snickers and pushes the door open, motioning for me to enter with a sweep of her hand. I can’t lie, there’s something about this room that’s soothing. The ambiance in here is incredible.
What the fuck?
Did I just say ambiance?
I sound like one of those HGTV guys.
The room has zero windows, the walls are painted a shade of navy, and the floor is completely covered in a foam rubber type surface. This would be the perfect place to take a nap, considering that I’ve had a whopping total of three hours of sleep in the last twenty-four. Three point five if you count the half hour of sleep I was able to snag in my truck during lunch break.
Last night Belle had a night terror, and nothing I did would console her. She was in that stage of sleep where she was vocal and crying for Casey, but she wasn’t alert. I rocked her and rubbed soothing circles on her back. I even sang the lullaby that Casey sang to her when she was a baby. I was at my wits end by the time she finally cried herself to sleep, cradled in my arms. I was completely heartbroken that in all the struggles I’ve battled to protect my little girl, this was one that I couldn’t win.
I know she misses her momma, but Casey isn’t in a healthy frame of mind to be a mother. Hell, I don’t think she even wants to be a mother. Maybe one day the two can reunite, but that’s a long and winding road years ahead. Casey never could see past herself to care for anyone else. I don’t think I’ve ever met a more selfish person in my life. How could you not want your own child?
This morning Belle was her normal self, and she didn’t even mention the nightmare. In the past I was certain she didn’t remember them, but this morning she wanted to talk about her mom, which makes me think subconsciously she does remember. She hasn’t really asked why it’s just the two of us, or why Grammy or Laney do most girl things with her. I try hard every day to be Dad and Mom, but it doesn’t always work out that way. I want my Belle to have wonderful people in her life and while the idea of dating sounds nice, I have a very impressionable little mind to consider. Besides, all the women I’ve dated lately have been a few bricks shy of a load.
“Mad, did you hear me?” Jordan asks, concern filling her eyes. “You’re not having another panic attack, are you?”
“Nah,” I exhale, “just tired today.”
Over the next thirty minutes Jordan leads me through the most awkward stretches I’ve ever seen before in my life all while telling me constantly, “Deep breaths in, exhale slowly.” I may be just a construction worker, but I know that it’s not common for the body of a man of my size to bend like that. I may or may not have missed out on a couple steps, but it honestly couldn’t be helped. Jordan had her ass right in my face the entire time—thick, round, and defined but smooth and soft. I’m a man for fuck’s sake. A man who hasn’t been satisfied by anything other than my hand in way too long. It’s not just that, though. Jordan is breathtaking, her body is incredible, but her heart is
just as pretty. Fuck me running, I’ve totally fallen for my trainer.
“Okay!” Jordan stands as we finish our last pose. “Don’t you feel more relaxed?”
I’m still laid flat on the mat, eyes closed. The room is swirling, and suddenly Jo doubles then triples, and her voice echoes about the space. Shit, I knew I shouldn’t have skipped lunch today and napped. I open my eyes and try to gather myself because this shit cannot happen in front of Jo again, but nope—still swirlin’. I pinch my eyes closed and inhale a deep breath. Jordan already sees me as an old fat man, and I can’t have her thinkin’ I’m a pussy too.
“Mad,” she prompts, nudging me with her foot. “Madden, I really need you to open your eyes.
“Give me a minute.” I keep my eyes closed and try to get the room to stop fuckin’ spinning.