He pulls back from our embrace so he can rest his hands on my shoulders. "What else did she say?" The question accompanies a raised brow. He's invested in this now. He's going to push until I tell him exactly what she said.
I fidget slightly from foot-to-foot trying to find the strength I need to tell him. "She's just delusional about us." There. That feels right.
"Delusional?"
"She thinks you're hiding something from me," I say it with a chuckle. It sounds absurd and I know it. I hate that I had to repeat those words to him.
"Like what?" His finger playfully pulls on my hair. "Did she say what it was?"
I stop and stare right into his eyes. I see the mask within them. It's the same mask that's always there when he's holding something back. "No," I answer cautiously. Why isn't he laughing this off? Why isn't he telling me it's ridiculous and that she knows nothing about him that I don't know?
"So she didn't elaborate at all?" What the hell? Elaborate on what if there's nothing to hide?
"Why would she elaborate on nothing?" I feel my shoulders tense beneath his touch. This conversation has gotten so far off the track I thought it would be on that I can't think straight. Is there a secret? Is he actually hiding something that my mother knows? How is that even possible?
"I don't think she likes me." He pulls a thin smile across his lips. "Actually, I'm sure she wishes I'd disappear."
I want to tell him that it doesn't take a brilliant mind to see that, but I'm not going to engage him in anything until I get to the bottom of this. "That goes without saying, Hunter." I want the part of the conversation that focuses on my mother's dislike for him to be over. He's sidestepping and right now he's tripping over his own two feet.
"Is there something?" Being direct is the only choice I see right now. I'll ask, he'll answer and we'll put to this rest.
"Something that I'm hiding from you?" Bingo. There is. He wants to volley the questions back and forth to avoid whatever it is.
I just stand in silence studying his face. I hone in on his eyes and that's when they drop. He can't hold my gaze. He won't hold my gaze. The man, who promised to love me forever and vowed never to keep secrets, is holding something within him that feels like a ticking time bomb.
Chapter 10
"I went to the store before I got home from work." He motions towards the kitchen. "I got everything you like so you won't even need to leave the house until we get back."
"I have to go to work and school." I also have to go and talk to my mother. I don't add that last part in because frankly I don't give a fuck at this point. I can tell by the way he's racing away to California with Cory and the fact that he's been avoiding me since we talked about my mother, that whatever the secret is, it's not going to be something I'll embrace.
"Sadie!" Cory comes running into the living room. "I'm taking this for my mom." He holds up a colored picture of a kangaroo with his name neatly spelled next to it.
"She's going to love that." I reach down to tousle his hair. "Did you pack everything?"
He nods excitedly before he scoots back down the hallway to his bedroom.
"I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you that we were going to see her." His voice is low and calm.
"I don't know why you thought you had to hide it." The words are pointed and direct and meant to sting. I hate this veil of secrecy that's surrounding him. "I brought up on his birthday that I thought they should at least talk to each other."
He shuffles his leather shoes on the hardwood floors. "I thought you'd want to come along."
Of course I would. I ached to be invited and it had nothing to do with seeing Christina. I would have avoided that if he'd asked me to go to see her with him and Cory. Just the joy of going anywhere with them was what I wanted and I knew if I was there, with them in California, I could give Hunter the emotional support he was going to need after seeing Christina again.
Cory's back in the room with his small backpack slung over his shoulder. His bright blue suitcase is skidding behind him on the floor. "Let's go, daddy." He pulls anxiously on Hunter's hand coaxing him towards the apartment door.
"You'll call me if you need me." The words sound so hollow and empty when he says them now. It's not like before. There's a weight hanging in the air between us. I know that he's aware that I suspect. He has to be. I can see it in his eyes.
"I'll be fine." I move towards the door. "I hope it's a good trip."
He leans down to brush his lips against mine before he pulls on the doorknob. "I love you, sunshine. Always."
***
"Dad." It's so empty and heavy coming from my lips. I didn't want to call my mother to ask her to meet me again because I was fearful that would give her a chance to prepare for my questions. I wanted to appear out of nowhere. She's never been good under pressure.
"Sadie." He only nods in response before he opens the door wide enough to let me in. I haven't been home since I moved into my own place last fall. It's exactly the same. Everything is prim, proper and in its place, including my parents.