"Don't call me that." He grabs my shoulder.
I pull back harshly as I twist my body so I'm facing him. I don't look up. I can't. I don't want to face him after realizing how easily he played on my emotions. "That's your name," I spit back.
"Look at me, Sadie." He takes a step towards me and I retreat so my back is pressed against the door.
I pull my gaze up so I'm staring directly into his face. "Why?" I seethe. "Why are you even here? Shouldn't you be with your fiancée?"
He doesn't flinch at the words. He doesn't move an inch. His gaze darkens as he runs his eyes over my face. "I need to explain."
I laugh at the suggestion. "You can't possibly explain everything." I try to push past him but his stance is resolute.
"I can and I will." He sighs and shoves a hand through his hair. I use the opportunity to quickly escape. "You're not leaving." I feel his hand grab my elbow just as I take a step towards the parking lot.
"Let go of me, Zander," I say his name again. It's giving me the emotional distance I need to keep myself in one piece.
"Never." He pulls me into his chest with both hands. "I will never let you go."
I stand silent for a moment soaking in the words. When he said that to me last week it offered an oasis of comfort and desire. I got lost in the words. I was so lost in him.
I twist abruptly until I'm free of his grasp. "It's not your choice." I turn and face him.
"Sadie, stop this," he pleads. "Come to my place. Let me explain."
"You've got to be kidding." I'm startled by his bold suggestion. Does he not understand that I'm never going back there? "We're done," I state boldly. "Done."
"No." He's shaking his head wildly back and forth. "Don't say that."
"You are marrying someone else," I scream. "You're engaged to her and you fucked me. That's disgusting."
"I don't want to marry her." His hands are trembling. "I want to be with you."
"You're unbelievable." I take a step back to gain distance. I can't listen to him telling me he wants to be with me. He doesn't mean it. He can't mean it. She's wearing his ring.
"Please," he begs. "Give me an hour to explain. One hour."
"No." I turn to walk away. "You're a liar. I don't want to hear it."
"I can't lose you." I hear him calling after me as I run through the parking lot towards the street. Once I'm certain he can't see me, I crumble to the grass and let out a deep, guttural cry.
***
"I want to go visit Dylan." I try to sound convincing. I doubt my father is going to buy into this. He knows that whenever my older brother and I are in the same room, the air is filled with tension and resentment.
"Since when?" He drops the newspaper he's reading so his eyes are peering over it. "Maria, get me another coffee, please."
Maria throws me a sympathetic look. After running my speech about how much I missed Dylan past her in the kitchen a few minutes ago, she warned me that my father would have more doubts about my sincerity than she did.
"I thought it would be good to go see him before school starts again." I sit across the table from him hoping he'll just agree so I can go upstairs to pack.
"What are you running away from?" He places the paper on the table, pulls off his reading glasses and stares directly at me.
"Nothing," I spit back a bit too eagerly.
"Last week you and your friend hopped a train to New York." There's no discernable emotion in his voice.
"You make it sound like we stowed away on a freight train." I laugh awkwardly. "We wanted to go explore the city."
"No." He leans forward and lowers his voice. "You wanted to go see a man."