My hands are on the duffel bag before the words leave his mouth. I tug the zipper open and wrench out the yearbook.
I flip through the pages as Barrett crosses the room to my home bar.
I took a small shot of scotch over an hour ago in an effort to calm the hell down.
It didn’t work.
Barrett pours himself two fingers, not bothering to ask if I want the same. He sees my empty glass. He knows I’ve had my fill.
?
??You mentioned Eden on the phone.” He turns to look at me. “You sounded shook up. That’s why I’m here.”
I don’t glance up at him because I’m still trying to locate the page in the yearbook that holds the answer to at least one of the questions that’s been nagging at me all fucking day.
“She’s in New York.” Looking up, I try to keep my voice at an even tone. “I saw her yesterday and again today.”
That brings the glass to his lips again. The scotch disappears in one gulp. “Eden Conrad is here? What the hell is she doing in New York?”
“She’s a lawyer.”
“A lawyer? You’re not serious, are you?”
My gaze skims the open page in front of me. I scan the pictures of the seniors finally landing on the face of the woman I thought I’d never forget.
I see it now.
Christ, why didn’t I see it in the club or when I had her in my bed?
She’s changed, but it’s her.
I slam the yearbook shut. “Jesus, what the fuck is wrong with me?”
I stalk to the bar and half fill the glass I used earlier. I take a mouthful of scotch and swallow.
“Is that rhetorical or are you waiting for me to answer that?” Barrett sets his glass down. “You’re torn up from seeing her after all these years. Is that what’s happening here or is this emotional shit storm I’m witnessing something else?”
I finish off the scotch, slam the glass down so hard it shatters, and I turn to face him. “I fucked her. I fucked Eden Conrad last night, and I didn’t have a goddamn clue it was her.”
***
Barrett hands me a mug of coffee.
I needed the coffee as much as he needed the time it took to brew it to process what I said.
He stared at me after I confessed that I took Eden to bed without realizing who she was.
Fuck.
All these years. All the want and I treat her like every other woman I’ve screwed.
Jesus, I’m an asshole. I’m nothing but a selfish asshole.
I’ve used women for years in search of a connection I could never find until last night.
Even if I wanted to make amends to the hundreds of women I’ve bedded in the past fifteen years, I wouldn’t know where to start. I only remember the names of a handful of them.
“So you didn’t know she was Eden.” Barrett shrugs out of his suit jacket. “Let’s start there.”