I’m second-guessing my decision to come here.
“Get it together, Athena,” I whisper harshly to myself. “You can do this.”
I haven’t decided what exactly ‘ this ’ is yet. After kissing Liam, I want more. How could I not?
His kiss did things to me. It made me imagine being underneath him and orgasms brought on by something other than my hand or one of the toys I keep hidden in my bedside table.
I haven’t had the best luck with my past lovers.
There are only two of them. I thought the first was all right until I got into bed with the second a year later and realized that sex could be kind of good.
Liam’s kiss was better than anything I did with either of those men.
A rush of air escapes my lungs as I hear Liam’s footsteps on the hardwood floor in the hallway outside the door.
“Athena?” His gravelly voice rumbles through the locked door. “Are you okay?”
No. I’m freaking the fuck out right now.
“I’m fine,” I call back. “I’ll be out in two minutes.”
Or ten; maybe twenty at the most.
“Take your time.” His tone deepens. “I put on some music. Join in if you catch me dancing.”
I smile to myself. I should jump into this with everything that I have, but I’m scared. I admit it. I’m afraid because he’s too good to be true and I’m terrified because he just got dumped.
I rest my head against the door when I hear him pad away on bare feet.
He took off the boots he was wearing as soon as we got here. I did the same. I dropped my coat on his sofa before I asked where the washroom was.
I needed some air and a chance to catch my breath after the kiss.
That kiss.
Turning to the mirror again, I point a finger at my reflection. “Don’t overthink this.”
It’s my mantra. When you grow up in the shadow of uncertainty around every corner, you learn how important a well thought out plan is.
Meeting Liam wasn’t part of my plan. Standing in his apartment with bare feet and a racing pulse wasn’t either.
The faint sound of music playing lures my
hand to the doorknob.
I twist the lock, turn the handle, and swing it open.
Tonight isn’t about a plan. Tonight is about having an adventure. I’m ready for whatever it is.
***
He’s not dancing when I walk back into the main living space. He’s picking at the bouquet that is sitting in the middle of his coffee table.
Petals fall to the wood as he tries to adjust the browned bits of the blossoms.
Those flowers are past their due date.
“You didn’t change the water when I told you to,” I accuse trying not to laugh.