“And I guess I’ve come to learn that you’re a lot stronger than we give you credit for,” he says in a low voice, his lips so close to mine.
Before I can even process the weight of his words or his closeness, he ruins the moment by leaning back and adding, “Plus, I wanted to make sure you were okay before lecturing you. I mean really, Thea? What were you thinking? Every time you jump in you end up getting hurt. Why can’t you just let other people deal with it?”
I catch him eyeing my—now bloodstained—taped-up fingers and move them out of sight.
“I was thinking that I didn’t want you guys ripping each other to shreds over something so stupid. Are you even okay? Is Mason?”
I was so preoccupied with my stupid bloody mess that I haven’t even considered if they’re
okay. Aiden looks fine, not even a scratch on him.
“We’re okay. Let’s not change the subject.” He dismisses my question. “Next time, if you see someone fighting, don’t jump in, okay? I was handling it.”
I stop myself from exploding on him. Don’t jump in? That’s like asking Nutella to stop being so delicious. Basically impossible. To Aiden, I say, “You were not handling it. You were going to eat him!”
“I was not going to eat him.”
“Obviously, I mean figuratively, not literally. You were eyeing him like you were trying to decide which size platter would best fit his head.”
“Can you really blame me? If it was anyone else their head would’ve already been on that platter before I even thought about it.”
I frown and look down at my lap. “He was emotional and drunk. He didn’t mean it.”
He narrows his perceptive eyes at me. “Didn’t he though?”
“I mean—I don’t know. Maybe? I don’t really want to think about it.”
Aiden runs a frustrated hand through his hair. “Why are you so damn content to ignore the way Mason’s been acting this whole trip?”
I shrink into myself. “How has he been acting?”
“Like a giant, fucking, self-absorbed, entitled prick!”
I shrug, feeling like nothing I say can be a good enough excuse. Because I know what I have to tell Mason, and that I’ll ruin his life, and I can’t do it.
I can feel Aiden’s frustration rising, but he takes a calming breath. “I know you. You’re so perceptive. You can’t really not notice what’s going on.”
“I just … I don’t know.” I think about the last few days. Really think about them, and try to be honest about what I’m feeling. “Every time I look at Mason, I think about Brian and my mom. And then I feel guilty for knowing and that it’s my mom who’s helping break his family …” I trail off, not meeting Aiden’s gaze.
“You’re mistaking guilt for not understanding he’s putting moves on you. I get that he’s going to be in a bad spot when he finds out, but you can’t let that excuse him from being a shitty friend,” Aiden says.
I know he’s right. “It won’t matter soon anyway.”
He clenches his fists and I can tell he’s trying hard to stay calm. “Because you’re leaving,” he finishes for me.
I’m suddenly desperate for him to not hate me. I don’t blame him for being mad—I understand, really. But when I got elbowed in the face, he and I went back to normal for a bit instead of being all tense and upset with each other. I really miss him, more than I thought I ever would.
“I told you, Aiden. I really wish I didn’t have to, but I have no choice.”
“But you do have a choice! It’s all your choice! It’s your life! You can’t just vanish and leave me with no way of ever seeing you or contacting you again.”
“I’m just trying to protect you! Protect everyone!” I defend my decision, hating that we’re going to have this fight again.
“It’s not your job to protect us.” His eyes are blazing, shoulders set with determination.
“What do you want me to do, Aiden? Stay here knowing that I’m putting you in danger? People died last time! How could I live with myself if something happened to any of you because of me?”
“I’m not asking you to put us in danger. We won’t be in danger. We’ll be careful, like we have been. You don’t have to do this alone anymore, Thea.” His voice softens, his eyes more vulnerable, slightly pleading. “I’m asking you to give us a chance. I know the risks, and I’m choosing to take them. Don’t leave. Don’t cut us off. Don’t give up on us.”