But I should know better. Even before the worst happened, Caben and I were never a simmer. We’ve locked blows and butted heads from the start. And it’s always been volatile.
Considering my life—the girl with a mercurial poison coursing through her—how could I ever believe my ending would be any less intense?
Abruptly, I feel the cold air jolt my skin as Caben releases my hand, taking his reassuring body heat from me. He grabs his head. A hoarse scream is ripped from his mouth. Anxiety tears through me at the shrill cry rending the air.
He halfway crawls, getting to his feet and stumbling toward a wraparound bar near the back of the room. I hear the clink and slosh of him fixing a drink, then Caben’s relieved exhale. He’s fracturing.
/> “Maybe,” I begin, then stop. Take a breath. “Maybe we should eat.” I’m sure he hasn’t eaten anything since he discovered drinking could block out Bale. Maybe even before. It could help absorb some of the alcohol and… I don’t know.
Can anything help at this point?
His hair falls into his eyes, obscuring my sight of them. When he lifts his head, the silver lining his irises blazes. The red dilating his pupils beams. “Always such a woman, huh?” A cruel smile tilts his lips. “Maybe it’s time you learned your place.”
Then he’s storming toward me, and I’m backing away on my hands and backside. I’ve seen this scene before. Lived it. In my home, between my mother and father…and I swore never to be her.
I’m on my feet, just pulling out of his grasp, before he’s on top of me. Instinctively, I reach for my sword.
He chuckles. “The fierce Nactue isn’t so tough without her weapon.”
I am, but not today. I don’t want to fight him, not when we only have hours left. I have to reach his humanity. “Caben, look at me. Look into my eyes.” I hold so still; hold my breath. “I’m not fighting you. I won’t. I’m not tricking you.”
His head inclines to the side as his gaze steals over me. “Good.” Then he turns and walks to a side room.
My breath whooshes out past my lips. I have no clue what I’m doing. Anyone who has any answers are far out of reach, and my instincts are misleading because of my feelings for him.
Will I be able to kill him when the times comes? When he’s in pain, suffering, calling out my name…maybe even pleading for me to do so? A cold chill sweeps over my skin. I really should have come to this answer long before now.
My thoughts end abruptly when Caben returns to the room. Something black and sheer in his hands.
He stalks toward me like I’m his prey. When he’s right before me, his hand whips out and grabs my throat. Even faster is the sudden, electric pain pulsing through me where his skin meets mine.
I’m forced to my knees, a strangled cry muted on my lips. Staring up at him, I plead with my eyes, trying to reach him one last time.
He releases me, and I gasp in a breath. “There. Better. It would be best if you submit willingly, but this works, too.” He shakes out the sheer material and holds it up. A very revealing gown. “Take off your clothes.”
The pain is ebbing, so it’s not what freezes me in place. The cool, calculating way in which he admires me does. We have no time left—I’m losing him.
Pushing aside any shame trying to sway me, I reach for the top button of my uniform.
? 25 ?
Caben
HER SKIN CALLS TO me. Silky and the color of cream. Beneath the beautiful cover, like a translucent taunt, swirls of silver flow. Like a map, inviting me to reach out and track my fingers down the paths.
I’m tempted, but in no hurry. Bale would have me kill her, and I nearly did. I even wanted to—and some part of me still insists it’s what needs to happen. When I’m sober and the dark goddess fills my thoughts, she has me convinced that she’ll not only spare me once she’s corporeal, but she’ll advance my power to that of a god.
It’s the line she’s fed me since the Reckoning.
But the alcohol—as ironic as it is—helps me see clearly. Bale has no intention of keeping me alive. That’s not part of the deal. There has to be a trade; one life for another. Mine for hers, so she can manifest on this plane. That’s how all dark magics work.
Since she’s already taking my life, I think I’ll take Kal for myself. Bale will have her moment soon enough. This is mine. And deep down, I know it’s all wrong. You can’t own a person or force them into submission. Only I can’t seem to quell my need for her any other way.
A chain around her neck catches my attention, and I look closer to see a ring there at its end. Not any ring; my ring. She recoils as I reach for it, but I’m quicker. Taking the silver ring into my hand, I hold it up to the firelight.
The red stone in its center glints. My crest, my family’s crest, fills me with longing. And the fleeting memory of when I entrusted Kal with it burns at the edges of my mind. Irritated at the emotions welling inside me, I unfasten the chain and slip the ring onto my finger. At least that’s one thing of mine properly returned.
Now, on to the other.