Because—suddenly and purposely—I realize I’ve been thinking of her in us stateme
nts. Hell.
Two points her.
9
Arian
Becca’s early morning call is not welcome after a night spent at a smelly bar, where I was humiliated—yet again—by the town’s football gods. Then had to walk home in the frosty night air, half wet and freezing, trying not to rage the whole way.
Vee, I could tell, was torn. The fact that Gavin wasn’t among the others last night helped, but she still couldn’t bring herself to take up my side completely, knowing that Gavin is a member of the opposing team.
I roll my eyes as Becca drones on through the receiver. Now I’m thinking in sports terms. Really?
Which I guess is just as well, considering I’m now a member of the Bobcat Boosters. I’m tempted to crumple the announcement sheet in my hand, but instead, I place it on my nightstand delicately, as if it might combust if I move too quickly.
“You know your father’s expecting you, Ari.” Becca is tapping her long, manicured nails against her cell. I can hear the click, click, click, while she waits for my response.
“Fine,” I say, plopping onto my bed. Defeated. “I’ll go. What time?”
The clicking stops. “Seven. And don’t worry about finding something to wear. I’ve already requested a gown be made.” A beat. “It will be ready when you arrive. We’ll go out for mani-pedis before the initial fitting.”
My chest twinges with an annoying, sharp pain. “What size?” I ask, low, dreading her answer.
She sighs. “I expect that by now, you’ll be able to fit into a two. But don’t go crazy,” she adds with a snide bite to her voice. “We don’t want you blowing up, either. Two is perfect. Aim for that. Carbs and exercise.”
By the time I hang up with Becca, my insides are so twisted I can’t even think of breakfast. Which I desperately need to eat before I venture to our first booster’s meeting. Sometimes I wish I could just hook up to an IV. Pump the right amount of nutrients straight into my system and not bother with the laborious task of actually eating.
Then the guilt punches me in the stomach. Eating is not supposed to be a chore, I recall my therapist stating. Very adamantly. But most days that’s exactly what it feels like. Especially when Becca starts in on me. When I’ve done something as stupid as sign up for a group that supports a jock whose current mission is to reduce me to a pile of writhing girl parts—from embarrassment as well as attraction.
The fact that both are equally torturing me is just more proof of how messed up I am. I’m attracted to a guy who treats me no better than his jockstrap. But I don’t let that rule my head. I’ve admitted just how hot Ryder is—I won’t start lying to myself. I draw the line there.
But he’s jock scum. Cocky and full of himself. Worse, he somehow thinks the more he pranks me, the more he’s wearing me down. Like I’ll just all of a sudden fall to my knees and be like, Wow! It took you making me feel like an utter loser to realize how in love with you I am. Thank you. Let me suck your cock.
I balk at my own crudeness, shocked. Then rush to get dressed for the day. I seriously need some nourishment before I lose all capacity to think straight.
The room door opens, and Vee enters with a towel twisted atop her head. “Hey,” she says. “Don’t look so pissy. At least you got his attention.”
I roll my eyes. “Yes, because putting condoms in your cranberry and vodka is the equivalent of sending roses for a jock, right?”
Her pretty face screws up. “Sorry. I’m all crabby today.”
I wave it off. “No worries. But would you really prefer it if Gavin was picking on you?”
She shrugs, and I wonder—not for the first time—if the confidence she normally exerts for the world is a mask. If she’s battling some severe insecurity beneath. “At least he’d know I exist.”
“Oh, Vee…” But then an idea hits me, pushing every other sentimental and rational thought I was going to voice aside. “You really mean that?”
Again, she shrugs a shoulder. She falls on her bed. Then decides sitting isn’t enough of a display of defeat and flops to her back. “Seems like the team respects someone who can get one over on them. Even if they express it all stupid. I mean, it’s football. It’s what they do.”
“Okay.” I nod, gathering my thoughts. I planned to let this last jerk-off move of Ryder’s go, just ignore him, figuring he’d get bored and move on. But I suddenly see a way for me to get some much-needed vengeance, and for Vee to get the attention she’s dying to have from Gavin.
“Do we have time to go into town before the booster thingy?” I ask.
Her blond eyebrows knit together, and she rolls onto her side to face me. “We do…why?”
I smile. For the first time all morning.