My cheeks burned flame red and I nodded mechanically. “Of course.” My voice came out as a squeak and I coughed, clearing my throat. “I mean, of course,” I said smoothly. “When?”
“Today,” Detective Aberson replied. “This afternoon. In about an hour, if you’re free.”
My eyebrows flew up and I blinked. “That is soon,” I said. “Are you sure this can’t wait?” My heart was pounding and a cold taste of fear seeped into my mouth. “I mean, I can come in later this week, maybe that would be better?”
“Today, Beth,” Detective Aberson said. For the first time, his voice sounded truly cold. I shivered.
“Okay,” I said. “I’ll be there soon.”
An hour later, Detective Aberson met me at the police station. We shook hands, then he led me into the same room where I’d spoken with him before. I was so nervous that I was shaking.
Detective Aberson looked deeply into my eyes, like he was searching for something hidden.
“We’re very close to pinning Amoruso down,” Detective Aberson said. He cleared his throat. “I know this has been a long time to wait for you, Beth, and I wanted you to know that we’re sorry.” He smiled grimly. “The wheels of justice turn slowly, so they say.”
I nodded. “It’s fine.” There was a lump forming in my throat and no matter how many times I swallowed, it was still there.
“Do you have anything you’d like to share?”
“Excuse me?” I squeaked loudly. “What?”
Detective Aberson frowned. “Have you noticed anything unusual, Beth? Has Amoruso tried to contact you?”
I shook my head. “No,” I lied. “I don’t know anything about what he’s doing right now.” That, at least, was technically not a lie – Alessio hadn’t mentioned any plans for his day.
“Okay,” Detective Aberson said. “Well, I get that you’re still working through a lot of grief, Beth. But this is very important to us. I’m counting on you to testify – that’s what’s going to play on the jury and send that scum to prison for the rest of his life.”
I nodded mechanically. “What if…” I trailed off, biting my lip. “What if the family retaliates against me for speaking up? Couldn’t they come after me, and make my life miserable?”
Detective Aberson frowned. “Well, that is a possibility, but they would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law if they were to try anything like that,” he said slowly. “Are you really that worried, Beth? When we spoke before, you were very determined to do this.”
I nodded. “I know,” I said slowly. “I’m really sorry, Detective. I think I’m just afraid.”
Detective Aberson nodded. He closed his notebook. But when I started to rise from my chair, he held his hand up.
“Not just now, Beth, if you don’t mind. I’ve got a few things I’d like to say first.”
My heart slammed against the walls of my chest and I gaped. “Are you kidding?”
“No,” Detective Aberson said. He smiled, but it wasn’t entirely happy. “I wanted to speak to you about guilt.”
I blushed. Oh my god, I thought. A wave of panic crested over me and I shivered. He knows. He knows all about me and Alessio together. He’s going to tell me that I’m in trouble now, that I won’t be able to testify because I’m too close. And then I’ll get in legal trouble for lying! Oh my god, what if I go to jail?
“Beth,” Detective Aberson said slowly. “Six months is a long time. You may have moved on from Michael…I noticed you’re no longer wearing your ring.”
“His father asked for it back,” I said sourly. “I couldn’t exactly refuse.”
“Ah, well, you really shouldn’t feel guilty…you know, if you’ve begun to move on from Michael.” Detective Aberson looked directly in my eyes. “It’s very natural, Beth.”
I nodded. A numb feeling was spreading through my limbs. I couldn’t tell if Aberson was playing me or not – was he just waiting for me to break down and confess that I’d been sleeping with Alessio? Or was he trying to play good cop, and get me to admit it freely.
“I have started to move on,” I said slowly. “But no one will ever mean what Michael meant to me.” I cringed – the phrase sounded so cheesy aloud. But I hadn’t exactly meant it in a way that was entirely positive. I knew that I would never feel the same way about anyone that I’d felt about Michael.
But I already felt stronger about Alessio than I ever had about my former fiancé.
“Well, that’s natural,” Detective Aberson said. “Just remember, you need to do this, Beth. Try thinking about it as closure.”
I nodded. “Okay,” I said. I shifted in my seat. “Can I go now?”