My heart beats faster….my mouth runs dry with lust and desire.
I’m pretty sure I’m falling for HIM!
His hot muscular body sets a fire in the pit of my stomach…
A burning that races all the way down to my center.
I can feel the intense heat and…
If I don’t have him soon then I might just die.”
“I walk through the midnight valley, thinking only of you…
you’re the love of my life and losing you makes me blue…”
Chapter One - Tia
“I don’t know, Mom,” I comment with a sigh as I wander around the bare room of my old college dorm. The white walls, the empty bed, the bare desk… it’s all too much. “I haven’t really thought much about it.”
“What do you expect me to tell you?” I can tell that my mother is distracted, she’s hardly listening to me at all. Knowing what she’s like it’s likely she’s in a nail salon or a spa, getting pampered like she’s a princess or something. I love her dearly, but she truly is a rich wife diva. I could be a bit like that too if I wanted, but that just isn’t me at all. “You knew this day was coming. You knew you were going to qualify from college. You should have made plans.”
I huff loudly and fling myself onto the small camp bed that I’ve spent my last few years existing on. I hated it at first, it was nothing like the luxury I was used to, but I quickly got used to it and threw myself into college life, and to be honest I’m going to miss it loads. My friends; Diana, Helen, and Alexa have left already. They are too busy looking forward to the future to bother worrying about what they’re letting go of. That’s just me… what is wrong with me?
I’ve loved everything about being at college. Maybe that’s why I haven’t thought much about what’s going to come next because I knew I wouldn’t be ready to let it go.
“I know, I should have. You’re right about that but I didn’t. Now I’m sitting here wondering where I’m supposed to go. I don’t even know where to live now.”
“So, come home,” Mom replies as if it’s completely obvious. “Your room is still waiting for you. Come back for a while and figure it out. It isn’t as if you have money troubles to concern you, you can spend all the time you want to figure out where you want to go next.”
Admittedly, that’s probably the best plan. I did the English Lit course because I want to write; stories, poetry, songs… all of that. Going home and getting started on that dream would be the smartest thing to do. Yet I don’t want to. Not quite yet.
“I will, Mom,” I reassure her while the cogs roll in my brain. “I do want to but I think I just need a time out from life first. I need a period to adjust to normal life again. I want to recover from college first, you know?” I can hear how ridiculous that probably sounds, but to me it’s just fact. “I’ve lost my friends, the course, the security of my life… I just need a break.”
“Go on a holiday,” Mom says, starting to sound a little weary with me. “Have a break, then come home.”
“I might get my stuff shipped back and do that.” I gaze out my window and try to work out where in the world I want to go. I’ve been most places, we travelled a lot when I was younger, there isn’t really anywhere I desperately want to visit. The only thing that calls to me a little is the ocean. “I might go on a cruise,” I comment idly as the idea sparks in my brain. “Try something a little different.”
“Yes, good idea.” Mom pauses for a moment and I brace myself while I wait to hear what’s coming next. Our conversations always end this way so I expect it. “So, do you maybe want to call your father about this? Tell him what your plans are?”
I have never had a close relationship with my father. Billy Daniels is a cold hearted man who cares about no one but himself. Mom knows this, but she puts up with him because of the lifestyle he provides her with. She loves the billions of dollars, the nicest house, the fancy, designer clothes… so much so that she doesn’t even question where the money comes from. I’m sure it’s dodgy, but since no one will ever tell me I’ve given up caring.
That’s another reason I don’t want to go back home just yet, I don’t want to deal with him just yet.
“No, Mom, if you want to tell him then maybe you could call him. You know my feelings on the subject matter. I won’t argue with him all the time anymore, it’s not like I’m a young teenager anymore, but we’re never going to be close.”
Mom waits, almost as if she’s trying to change my mind, but it’s not going to happen. I know that I need to stick to my guns with this one. Me and Dad will always be distant, that will never change.
“Right, okay, sweetie. Well I have to get on. You get your stuff shipped and I’ll sort it out so it’s all ready for you when you get home.”
“Yeah, thanks, Mom. I think I’ll book the cruise now so I’ll send you the details once it’s done.”
After we hang up the phone I pull my laptop back out the case and I eagerly turn it on. The more I think about the cruise idea, the more I like it. That’ll give me some time and space for self reflection and writing too. I can get some inspiration while out on the ocean and I can also hunt about for some jobs. The sooner I get work, the sooner I can get out of home and leave my messy family life.
I scan through the options, barely looking at where the cruises are going. That’s not important, I just want to get one that starts within the next couple of days. I want to get off this island now, I just want to be on the water so I can forget everything.
Eventually I find one that leaves in the morning, Princess Cruises, the company is ironically called. It’s luxurious, probably more than I should be spending on a break away from my life, but I have to have some benefits from my wealthy family. If I’m being kept in the dark about my dad and his dodgy dealings, then I at least want some benefits.
I fly through the booking details, entering the card details off the top of my mind. It’s safe to say that I do a lot of online shopping when the mood takes me. I’ve known all the details to use the credit cards since I was fourteen years of age.