Several long minutes pass, and I keep my eyes glued to the television, waiting for it to flicker to life. I don’t know if I want more proof that he’s evil or if the screen staying black is proof that Lola is right, and I can trust him.
“Where’s Lola?” Penny asks.
“Upstairs in Javier’s office,” I answer.
“What is he doing to her?” Amanda asks.
“I don’t know,” I confess.
They draw the line at asking what he’s done to me the last two times I’ve gone in there. It’s possible they don’t want to know, or more than likely, they’re a lot like me and wouldn’t know what to say if I told them that he was assaulting me.
***
Lola comes back in time for showers, but she seems more agitated rather than hurt or scared. Most days we all just keep our heads down as we wait for the shower to become available.
Today, however, I keep my eyes on Lola. I don’t recognize any new bruises on her skin. The ones on her hip from Javier’s fingers from the first night are turning yellow. The irritation on her wrists is healing as nicely as mine are. So, I know he isn’t hurting her anymore. At least not in ways that are visible.
I’m lucky enough to end up right beside Lola today because Megan refused to get out of her cage. Angel didn’t look happy, but he allowed her to stay. I’m sure he can see that she’s too weak to walk.
“What happened up there earlier?” I ask, keeping my voice low and hoping Angel can’t hear me over the spray of the water from his position near the door.
“Things are fine,” she says, but her eyes are no longer darting around like they were the first time we were in here.
Either she knows she’s safe or she’s given up. Considering she doesn’t look like she’s stopped eating like Megan has, I have to work under the assumption that it’s the former.
“Fine?” I hiss, wondering how far I can push her to give me information and if it will even work. “Do you know what he does to me in the office?”
This gets all of her attention. Her eyes snap to mine as her hands clamp down on my upper arms so I can’t turn away from her. “Does he hurt you?”
I swallow, unable to even bring myself to lie, and I don’t have the energy to try to determine if it’s to protect him or protect myself.
“Is he forcing himself on you?”
It hits me like a freight train that Lola can’t believe he’d do something like that to me, but then her features immediately change into something darker, something a little menacing.
“What’s going on?” I ask, the question coming out like a plea.
God, from the look on her face, I don’t know if I want the truth or not.
“He’s mine,” she growls, her tone deeper and darker than I’ve ever heard it.
I take a step away from her, wincing when I feel her fingernails scrape across my arms. Red streaks bloom on my pale skin almost immediately.
She looks down at them, a flash of guilt washing over her face before it goes back to that look that makes me nearly as afraid of her as I was of Juan before he ended up with a bullet in his head.
“Yours?” I ask, unable to just let it go.
“Do you know where I was before this place?” She takes a step closer, but thankfully keeps her hands to herself this time.
I realize that all of us shared a little about ourselves after Megan started sharing about herself. It felt good to tell people about who we really were. I kept mine very superficial. I didn’t mention Knight Salvation or my sister, instead talking about old friends from the diner I worked at before I got into healthcare.
Lola kept quiet during that time. The woman who was always upbeat and encouraging us to keep our heads up said nothing.
“This place is a million times better than where I came from. I don’t care how Javier treats me. I’m his to do with as he pleases because I can’t leave here. I never want to leave. You see him as a monster, but I’ve known real monsters, and that man doesn’t even come close. Do you understand?”
I shake my head because it makes some sense, but not completely.
“We need to get out of here. I know if we work together, we can—”
“Do you know what they do to the girls who are left behind when others escape.” She looks over my shoulder in Angel’s direction. “Do you really think we can get out of here with Megan? Are you willing to leave her behind?”
I shake my head. I may not be able to volunteer getting hurt in place of someone else, but I know I’d never be able to leave someone to get punished for my choices. Trying to take her would get us caught, and we’d all suffer the same fate.