one of you.”
“Still, you shouldn’t be careless.”
The doorbell rings again as I dump the noodles in the water, and Mathis goes to answer, since he apparently locked it after he came in. Both Nicky and Shaw walk in with their own bottles of wine. I go to Nicky first and cup his cheek, searching his face. It’s a habit I formed after we both went into remission.
He silently does the same. When we’re both satisfied, we silently give a shake of the head and hug tight. He kisses my temple and moves to the appetizers on the counter. Then I’m faced with Shaw’s overwhelming presence. A surge of desire and longing shoots through me as I take him in.
His six-foot two frame towers over me. He’s kept a well-trimmed beard for the last few years that sets off his full lips His eyes glow with shades of gold. It’s no secret I have unusual eyes, but when I stare into his, I could lose myself for days. They are the most soulful eyes I’ve ever seen on anyone in my life, have been since the day I first saw him.
It’s so much more though, every time I see him, he exudes a raw, deep, and undeniable sex appeal. The kind of appeal that no one else can match.
Through the years, I’ve become a master at hiding the feelings swirling when it comes to Crenshaw Bennett. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that he’ll always see me as a sick, young girl. Even now, at almost twenty-five, he’s never looked at me as a woman. I’ve tried to get over my hopeless infatuation, but there’s no denying that he owns a piece of my heart.
That’s why, when I find myself suffocating under the pressures at work, he’s who I turn to. The instant I’m in his big strong arms, the weight of grief dissolves. He handles me so gently, I almost feel precious in his embrace.
“Bizzy,” he says, kissing my cheek. He mirrors Nicky’s move by searching for any sign of sadness. I know he’s worried about my breakdown last week, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that Grady is going to die soon.
“I’m good, Shaw. Promise.”
He nods but instead of moving his hand, he sweeps his thumb across my lips gently. My breath hitches, and his eyes flash. Something passes between us, but I’m too lost in his gaze to figure out what it is.
“I’m starving.” Nicky opens a beer and slides onto a barstool.
Shaw drops his hand as I snap out of my trance and move to the stove.
“I tripled the recipe. You should be fine.”
“What are we having?”
“Dipshit!” Shaw slaps Nicky’s head. “You never ask. When will you learn? It’s rude.”
“It’s just Bizzy!”
“You need to learn to be suave. Say something along the lines of ‘What smells so delicious?’.”
“Suave, huh? When did you become the master on charm?”
“I’m trying something new.” I break up their argument. “It’s organic.”
The kitchen goes silent. Mathis looks to the ceiling, and Nicky makes a face like I’m serving dog food. Shaw purses his lips.
“Guys, it has chicken!” I defend, but get no reaction. “Fine, it’s a Chicken Parmesan with rotini and roasted vegetables.”
Every shoulder in the room relaxes.
I hand Mathis the table settings and instruct Nicky to help. When they walk out, Shaw comes up behind me and lays his hands on my shoulders. He threads his fingers through my hair, gently untangling the waves. It’s no secret how much I wanted long hair after the chemo. It took years to get it the same length, but the day I walked out of the salon with the style I’d dreamed of for years, I had a celebration.
“Your hair looks beautiful tonight.” He leans in so close I feel him inhale, then exhale, his warm breath scorching the skin on my neck. “So do you.” His voice is husky.
Holy shit. My knees wobble, and I have to grip the counter to stay upright. Butterflies start to swarm in my stomach and fly wildly throughout my body.
Get a grip! I mentally chastise myself.
“What can I do to help?” His tone is still low.
“You can… umm… maybe.” Shit my mind goes blank at the feeling of his chest against my back.
“I think I’ll open some wine.” He moves away.