You’re a billionaire, Sophie. Why are you feeling all this envy now?
But it wasn’t envy. It was open, bare-faced jealousy, and I had a right to feel it. Joey Tangen had chosen to let me live in that trailer with my mom struggling to support us, while he’d kept his family in a beautiful home in a fairytale setting. No number of designer handbags or luxurious mansions would ever change the past. It made me so furious, I had to take deep breaths and remind myself that it wasn’t Molly’s fault, and it wasn’t Susan’s fault.
Sasha, I still wasn’t a huge fan of. She’d known about me, and she’d been fine with the situation. No matter how civil we were to each other, I would always carry a little spark of resentment over that.
Dogs barked as I climbed the stairs to the sprawling porch. I didn’t have to knock; the door opened as I reached it.
“Sophie!” Molly ran out and threw her arms around me while two huge Golden Retrievers rushed me.
“Whoa, whoa!” I laughed, and Sasha appeared right behind her daughter to scold the dogs. “No, they’re fine,” I said. “I don’t mind dogs.”
“I’m so happy you came,” Molly said, still clinging to me. She’d grown since the last time I’d seen her, which seemed pretty damn miraculous considering everything she’d been through. She’d lost some weight that she hadn’t really been able to afford to lose; she felt sharp beneath her shirt, and the girlish roundness was gone from her face. She was beginning to look more adult. More like...
I took her by the shoulders and stepped back to examine her. My god, she looked just like me at her age, with darker skin and slightly more prominent cheekbones.
“You’re up and around! I thought you’d be...I don’t know. Not...”
“You thought I’d be all sickly in my hospital bed?” She shrugged. “Not so much. At least not now that I’m home from the hospital.”
“You’re all skin and bones though. Are you okay?” I asked, and I couldn’t help but leave my hands on her shoulders.
Sasha leaned against the door frame, her arms crossed over her chest in the cold evening air. “She had a hard time keeping anything down for a while.”
“I had to have an NG tube for like, ever,” Molly said, rolling her eyes. “Do you know what those are?”
“Neil had one for a long time.” I’d hated that he’d had to have one, and I hated the thought of my poor defenseless baby half-sister having one.
Sasha motioned into the house. “Come on inside,” she said, then gasped. “Molly Lee! You do not go outside without any shoes on!”
“Oh my god! Aren’t you immunocompromised?” I scolded her right along with her mother. Even the slightest cold could take someone on anti-rejection drugs down. A kidney infection had almost killed Neil.
“Catching a cold from being cold is an old wives’ tale.” Molly’s tone revealed that she’d been using that argument for a while.
“And I’m sure when you’re in the hospital, the infection will realize its error and leave,” Sasha said in that dry, sarcastic tone only a mother could perfect. “Go change those wet socks.”
Molly made a loud noise of frustration and headed off, her stomping feet punctuating every step on the way upstairs.
Sasha took a deep breath and sighed with a tired smile. “Kids.”
“Yeah. I mean, most of my child-related conflict is over things like, ‘no, you can’t take a bite out of every cookie in the package and then put them back,’ but I totally get it.” Or not. Maybe there was unique exasperation that came exclusively with motherhood.
“Come on in, and have a seat,” Sasha said. “We’re just having pizza tonight. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all.” I rarely got to have pizza anymore, and sometimes, I missed it. “I wish you would have mentioned it. I could have picked it up in town.”
“Oh, that’s not necessary,” she said with a wave of her hand. “Susan’s picking it up on her way back from L’Anse.”
My hackles rose. “Oh. I didn’t realize Susan was going to be here.”
“She wasn’t going to be, but she changed her mind at the last minute. She wanted a chance to see you, and Travis just happened to have a job in Houghton this week. She’s been visiting old friends, so this will be the first time we actually get to have dinner with her.”
“Oh. M-maybe I shouldn’t have come,” I stammered. “I mean, so you guys can have family time.”
Sasha’s face fell. “Of course you should be here for family time. Sophie...after everything you’ve done for us—“
That wasn’t why I wanted to be a part of their family. I didn’t actually want to be a part of their family at all. “I know, but I also know what it’s like when you don’t get to see your kids for a long time. At least, from my mom’s perspective. When I moved to New York, my visits home were few and far between. And that made them precious. I would understand if you didn’t want to share her with me.”