“Roxy?”
I look up in disbelief.
“Helen?”
“Oh, I’m so glad I found you!” She comes flying across the pavement, arms out. I barely have time to open my own when she falls on me, sweeping me into an enormous bear hug. I’m trying to talk but its all muffled by her hair.
As we pull apart, she holds out Dad’s jacket.
“I brought this for you. I’ve never seen you go anywhere without it. I thought it must be important to you.”
“It is.” I shrug it over my shoulders, pulling it around me. “Thank you.”
“How about we hit the diner and talk?”
I’m smiling so hard I think my face is cramping. I nod as I take her hand.
We walk along and the silence between us is easy and deep. Maybe, we won’t need to explain everything. I’m still really upset about her calling the cops. It’s shaken me up pretty badly.
When we get to the diner and take our booth, Helen just orders a cup of tea and a berry muffin. It’s only now that I realize her cheesecake and latte from last time were a real step out of her usual.
I order chicken meat balls, fries, bacon and egg on toast and a slice of cherry pie. Helen laughs and shakes her head. The sound of her laugh is warm and comforting. But there’s something I need to know.
“Helen. Why did you call the police? Did you really think I would steal from you?”
She looks down, almost ashamed. Her fingers trace on the cheap plastic table.
“I can only think of one reason. While I was sitting in my apartment freaking out only one reason made any difference to me at all.”
I’m fascinated. I didn’t expect this. “Why?”
Her eyes come up, shimmering green, and meet my own.
“I had to see you again. I knew that I would never find you by myself—although after I saw the stuff and realized what happened I did try to figure out where you had gone. I didn’t want you to get into any trouble. I just wanted to talk to you. I couldn’t believe you ran off on me.”
I stare at her, my face frozen. “I didn’t.”
“I know that now. I’m sorry Roxy, I guess I’m still learning about trust.”
“Let me tell you something about trust.” I grab a handful of fries as the waitress sets them down. “I’ve never stayed still because I’ve never trusted anyone. Every time I tried, I got screwed over.”
Helen looks sad and frightened right now and I know she’s probably expecting me to break up with her. She did break my trust.
“So, all this time, I thought trust was something I had to generate. An effort that I needed to make. I didn’t realize that a situation could come along that made me feel safe, even without me deciding it.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that I trust you Helen. Like it or not I trust you… I love you.”
Silence rings in my ears as Helen blinks at her tears. Our hands find each other across the table.
“I love you too, Roxy!” Her voice is only a little more than a whisper. “I can’t stand to think of my life without you.”
I squeeze her hand gently. “Well you won’t have to. I’m not going anywhere. I went out looking for a bus and didn’t make it further than the Nook.”
“I’m so sorry, Roxy.” Helen looks like she’s about to whip herself.
“It’s okay, Helen. I only ran because I knew, no matter what you did to me, I was still going to trust you and love you. I knew that the first moment I let you put a rope on me.”