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“Shh, I’m pledging now.”

Beaker held up one finger to his beautiful mocha lips. He looked around on some Secret Service shit.

“I really don’t even wanna be down but my pops, gramps, and big brother are Bleed Beta.”

I’d heard this shit before. “Beak, what’s your last name?”

“DuBois, why?”

“Oh, shit!”

Weeks went by, I played the game like I didn’t know he was Phillips’s baby brother, and Beaker tutored me and earned points with Beta. I even managed to pull a C out of chemistry. Later, my boy Beak would ask me for a favor.

I’d bumped into him in the student union. “Damn, Beak, your face is fucked up!”

I guess his future Beta brothers didn’t care if he was related to Mr. America, ’cause it looked like my boy Beak had taken three the hard way. Back when I was associated with Mare, I used to get my rocks off on all the attention. Pledges would approach me on campus begging me to keep Mare busy all night. Seeing Beaker scared, face shot to hell, and paranoid just didn’t give me that same rush anymore.

“Dini, can you meet me later in Miller Hall?”

“Hell, no! Whatever you got to tell me you can do it right here!”

Beaker started looking around like a crackhead getting ready to sell you some hot shit, and let out a deep breath.

“Listen, Dini, I’m still a virgin. I dated the same girl all through high school. I just knew this girl was going to be my future wife. We decided to lose our virginities on our prom night and…I’m sorry, Dini, I’ve been practicing this in my head all day. I didn’t realize it was…this is just so hard.”

I snickered. “Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, Beak, I don’t mean to interrupt As the World Turns, but I got to roll out.”

“Wait, Dini!”

He grabbed my arm and I gave myself mad props. Why? Because if a motherfucker had done that a year ago, I would have broke my foot off in their ass. Beaker was different, though, and he looked so hurt.

“Here we go again! Beak, you got five minutes to plead your case.”

He took my hand and led me to a table. I sat on the bench and he straddled it so that he was facing me. I glanced down at his lap. I know, bad habit. Damn, was Beaker smuggling socks, or what?

“On prom night, we made it to the hotel room and she asked me to undress for her. So I did this mean striptease for her. I had the Luther Vandross CD, the candles lit, and er’thang! I took off my jacket, then my tie, my cummerbund, my shirt, and finally…”

“Damn, what?”

“When I took off my pants, Dini, her eyes got big. When I pulled down my boxers, she grabbed her purse and ran out of the room. I still don’t know what I did wrong. She never spoke to me after that day. I been living like a monk ever since.”

Beak looked like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. He started fiddling with the hem of his lab coat. He took another deep breath and started talking at warp speed.

“The big brothers told us we have to start choosing little sisters and the whole campus knows the pledge picks the girl they get down with and I ain’t trying to put myself out there again. I thought I would ask you.”

Damn, I must have a Beta magnet implanted in my ass. “Listen, I don’t do virgins.”

He took my hand. “The other day you left some papers in the chemistry lab and I got your address from the registrar’s office. I drove to your house, Dini, and I saw you outside playing with a little boy who I am going to assume is your son, right?” Beaker turned over my hand. “I don’t see a ring on your finger.”

I know nerd boy wasn’t going to blast me for being a single mom! I tried to snatch my hand away, but he tightened his grip, leaned in close, and smiled.

“I admire you, Dini. I like the way you keep your head up. You’re beautiful, you seem like a caring mom, and I know you’re smart. I guess I just wanted to ask for your help and let you know that I understand that some of us hide life’s scars well.”

Was he Dr. Phil? Am I Oprah? Were we supposed to be sharing a moment?

“If you need a place to hang when the brothers are beating your ass, just let me know.”

I grabbed my backpack and started to walk away. Delight ain’t playing with the lateness! He had the prettiest smile just like his brother, damn him! Beaker followed me out and opened the door for me.


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