I hate how many people Enzo has killed. He killed his own half-brother, Pietro, even though he didn’t know the relationship at the time. He still doesn’t know of his relationship to Milo, or Pietro, or Felix. Should I tell him?

I hate how I can’t protect him and the baby I carry at the same time. I protected Enzo in the past. And he protected me. But this baby is bigger than both of us.

And this baby in my stomach is at risk from everyone. No matter whose it is—Milo’s or Enzo’s.

It makes no difference. I will love the baby the same. I hate both men, so it doesn’t really matter.

But this baby, I already love.

This baby gives me hope. Hope that the future doesn’t have to be filled with violence, pain, and death.

If only I can hide this baby from the world.

Felix will try to get to this baby. To either kill it, if it’s Enzo’s to revenge his brother’s death. Or to corrupt it, if the baby is Milo’s, and use the baby to gain his own power in the Black empire.

Enzo will no doubt try to protect the baby and fail, because no matter how he tries to protect those he loves, he can’t save them, not as long as he belongs to this dark world.

And the crew, the men and women who work for us, those I thought were on our side and loyal to a fault, will turn on us if this baby is Enzo’s. There always has to be two heirs. One Miller and one Rinaldi. One from me and one from Enzo. This baby could be a mix of both. This baby would represent betrayal and disloyalty to them. They will kill the baby to ensure they destroy our love, as they have in previous generations. They won’t understand Milo already did that. They won’t understand Enzo is free to produce his own heir. That this baby is mine, and this child will take no part in this world—ever.

I refuse to let this baby be used as a pawn. I refuse to train this child to become the strongest to win a stupid battle for power.

Although, I know deep down I’m lying to myself. Because even if I lose the battle to become Black, I will still prepare my child for a possible future battle. I may not want them to become Mr. Black, but I will do everything I can to protect them. And that means preparing them for a battle, not to necessarily win, but to ensure they are strong enough to survive.

I rub my stomach absentmindedly as I climb back in bed with Langston lying next to me. And I know I won’t be sleeping.

Enzo helped me sleep, but that’s all I could tolerate. My body is at war with itself.

Hate and love playing equal parts.

I hate Enzo.

But despite Milo’s best efforts, there is a part so deep inside that still clings to my love for Enzo.

I won’t spark those feelings. I won’t let them surface. My sole focus is on protecting my child, and Enzo only brings with him destruction, even if he doesn’t intend to.

I need to live in the hate. I need to fight any coming feelings. I must protect my child from everyone. Even my own desperate love. I must. I’m a mother, and a mother will fight anyone who threatens her child.

I HAVEN’T LEFT my bedroom in days. I should get out. I need to figure out a plan. Because I need to get as far away from everyone as possible. I need to ensure Enzo becomes the next Mr. Black, as he was always destined to be. And then I need to disappear. Somewhere where no will ever find me.

Not Enzo.

Not Felix.

Not my father.

Not Langston.

Not even Liesel.

The only way to keep my child safe is to keep his or her identity under wraps. To hide the child from the world. Even from Enzo. He deserves to know the truth of the child, but he can never know.

I won’t let my child go through any of the pain that Enzo and I had to go through to prepare for the games. My father fucking sold me to prepare me. And Enzo’s father abused, beat, and trained him as a heartless soldier. No child of mine will ever go through that.

The Miller line will die with me. No one will know another Miller exists. I will be the end.

No one will battle for the Black empire anymore. Enzo and his children will gain full power—forever.

He’ll probably have a child with Liesel, if the child Liesel spoke of isn’t already Enzo’s. It warms me to know he will end up with a woman who loves him and will take care of him when I’m gone.


Tags: Ella Miles Truth or Lies Dark