They start pulling me to a different room—one filled with men. The shakes return, and my eyes widen. I thought only one man would take my virginity. I thought only one man would rip me apart, violate, and ruin me. But there are six men in the room.
I don’t know what they plan, but I’m outnumbered. I turned seventeen yesterday. Still too young for anything like this to happen. But being too young won’t stop it.
I don’t know what I expect. But I don’t expect this. I feel a kick in my side, then a slap to the face, followed by being thrown into a wall.
When they said ‘break’ they literally meant break.
And my body starts the slow process of turning into a shattered pile of bones.
Another hit.
Another kick.
A yank of my wrist.
I try not to cry out, to keep my voice and pain to myself, but I can’t.
I scream.
My eyes fly open. It’s a dream. It was just a dream.
I pant heavily as cold sweat covers my body.
My body burns as it did that night. I don’t know if that night was the roughest they were on me, but it was the hardest night for me. It was the beginning. The not knowing what to expect. The unfamiliarity of the agony with each hit, putting fresh wounds onto my body for the first time. That was what destroyed me.
I scream at the pain. Even though I’m awake, I can still feel it, still hear their grunts, still see their smug smiles brighten at the enjoyment they got from hurting me.
“Kai.” A loud pounding comes at the door.
I still.
“Kai, open the door.”
Enzo.
He’s back.
And I don’t know how to feel.
He came back. That should make me shrink in terror, but I like that he came back. It means I’m not alone anymore.
I should go open the door and let him in, but I’m pissed. At him for keeping me captive. For leaving me alone. For letting me endure my nightmares when he could easily stop them by sleeping here with me.
So I don’t open the door.
Enzo doesn’t get to see my pain, my tears. He doesn’t get to see what leaving me did to me. Because as much as I want to be free, this is the only place I have a chance of healing.
I pull my knees tight to my chest as I rock myself in the corner, trying to calm myself. I can’t. My icy veins are pulsing so hard I’m afraid my heart is going to give out from the speed.
I close my eyes even though the room is already dark from the blackout curtains. The darkness often saves me, but it can’t save me from this.
I hear the door handle rattle as Enzo tries to get inside.
I don’t know why he wants into my room so badly. Is he pissed I had men install locks on the door? Did his business dealing go badly and now he wants to blow off steam on me?
He can’t get inside. There are six locks on the door, none which have keyholes on the other side. They are all various chains and bolts keeping anyone and everyone out.
I’m safe in here.