“Because she dislikes everything and keeps telling me I need to act like a lady. I can’t play outside or invite my friends over. I can’t run to hug Papa when he comes home. I can’t cry or scream. So I do it here, you know.” She motions at the park. “I cry and scream here when no one is around.”
“She’ll want to take you when they divorce.”
She sniffles, her eyes doubling in size as she stares at me again, then she violently shakes her head. “No. I don’t want that.”
“When other adults ask you, tell them you want to stay with your father.”
“And…and they’ll let me?”
I nod. “That’s what Sally did. She chose her mum and they let her live with her.”
“Does that mean I’ll never see Mum? I don’t want that.”
“You will, but you’ll stay at home with your father most of the time.”
She draws a crackled breath, offering me a small smile. “Thank you. I’m glad you’re the first one I told this.”
“Me, too.” I get to see her like this when no one on this earth ever will.
Suddenly, a thought takes over me and becomes a need.
Just like the need I had when I wanted more chaos.
“Now tell me your secret,” she demands, still fighting with the remnants of her crying.
I grin. “I want to be your first.”
“My first in what?”
My thumb wipes the moisture under her eyes. “In everything, Butterfly.”
“Then I want your firsts, too.” She juts her chin. “Promise me.”
“Promise.”
2
Doll Master
Hello.
You don’t know who I am, but I know who you are.
I’m the monster under your bed and the bogeyman in your closet.
I’m the unknown.
You don’t see me unless you look for me, and even when you do, are you sure you’ve looked hard enough? Searched thoroughly enough?
Here’s something you need to know about me: I like dolls.
Or rather, one particular doll.
My father didn’t let me play with dolls. He said he didn’t like them and they weren’t for me.
So I hid my doll and proved him wrong.
Now, I’m proving everyone wrong.