Mum sits in front of her console, her blonde hair falling on either side of her face and stopping a little under her neck, dishevelled and all over the place.
Her cobalt blue eyes are bloodshot and lost in the mirror. Streaks of mascara mark her cheeks, and she holds a red lipstick in her hand that matches the colour on her lips.
Her other hand clutches a half-full glass of red wine. Her satin nightgown is creased and the robe is tied wrong around her waist, but it doesn’t hide her model body or her exotic beauty that everyone in the media talks about.
The model politician. Beauty can be smart.
That’s Mum in their eyes. A successful, beautiful woman who can debate in the parliament for days. But they don’t see the woman I see. They don’t witness her like this, lost somewhere no one can find her.
“Mum…” I approach her slowly, a tear sliding down my cheek.
Her head turns in my direction like a robot. For seconds, she stares at me as if I’m a stranger, as if she’s seeing me for the first time in her life. Then slowly, too slowly, her lips pull up in a warm smile.
“Babydoll, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be at school?”
“You haven’t answered my calls since last night.” My voice breaks at the end as I wrap my arms around her neck in a tight embrace. “Why didn’t you answer?”
“My battery died. I forgot to charge it.” She pats my back.
“I was so worried, Mum.” I sniffle into her neck, stopping myself from telling her I didn’t sleep a wink last night. If I hadn’t known Papa had an important meeting this morning, I would’ve made him drive me to her in the middle of the night.
“I’m okay.” She pulls away from me and scowls. “Why are you crying, Silver? Ladies don’t cry in front of other people.”
“Mum…let me tell Papa so he can help you —”
“We spoke of this before,” she cuts me off, her tone turning firm like she’s in a debate. “Sebastian has no involvement in my life anymore. If you tell him anything about me, I’ll consider it a betrayal.”
“But, Mum…”
“He already thinks that I’m on the wrong side of the party and he’s on the right one. Not only has he decided I’m no longer good enough for him, but he also took you away from me, my beautiful baby girl.”
“I’m here, Mum. Do you…do you want me to move in with you?”
“Absolutely not. That will seem as if I’m asking for pity after I announced I want to focus on my career.”
I wish Mum would stop thinking about the media, the press, and her friends when she makes her decisions. I wish she’d look in the mirror — really look in the mirror — and base those decisions on not only her reflection, but also the woman on the inside.
I wish she’d stop trying to prove herself to her dead father who pushed her to be a perfectionist, or to my dead grandparents from Papa’s side who criticised her for everything. They wanted their prodigal son to marry an aristocrat’s daughter, so when he married Mum, they kind of made her life hell as revenge. Nothing was good enough in their eyes. So she took it out on Papa. It was a vicious cycle.
But I learnt to stop wishing for things when it comes to my mum. She’ll only do what she thinks is good for her image and her career.
That’s why she’s been making me slowly but surely change to fit that image.
“Okay, happy thoughts.” She shows me her red lipstick. “This one is amazing. Let me try it on you.”
“Mum —”
“Stay still.” She places her glass of wine on the counter and paints my lips, then looks at me with awe. “Look at you growing into a wonderful young lady. You’re my pride, Silver. It’s because of you that I survive this rotten, man-infested world.”
“Then please answer my calls next time.” I’m still high off the adrenaline, slightly trembling from thinking I’d lost her.
“I will. Now, happy thoughts.” She smiles, and it’s radiant. It’s the reason her snobbish friends are jealous of her – because she’s the most beautiful amongst them all. She’s the one who attracts attention and gets invited to radio and talk shows.
“I got a perfect score in maths.”
“I’m so proud of you.” She strokes my cheek and I lean into her touch, fighting the tears that are about to break free.
I would do anything to keep that expression on her face, so I say, “I…I got engaged to Aiden King.”