I laugh out loud then hide the sound with the back of my hand. He’s an anomaly. A serious one.
And he’s the only one who makes me laugh even when he doesn’t intend to.
The next text came two hours ago.
Ronan: It’s been exactly twenty-four hours since you disappeared on me. Congrats on the ghosting effort, but it’ll come to an end. I’m going to hire a PI and even the MI6 to find you. Brace yourself.
His last two texts came an hour ago.
Ronan: I’m at the Meet Up and I kicked everyone out to smoke weed and think about you in peace. I miss you and I’m going to fuck you when I find you, my crazy belle. Oh, and my calls have started with the PI. I’m going to convince Ethan to file a missing person report. You’re going down.
Ronan: I fucking miss you, though.
My chest squeezes so hard after reading the last words, so hard I’m surprised my heart doesn’t tear out of my ribcage and jump out of its confinement. How can he say words like that so easily, as if he was always meant to say them to me?
How can he get to me so effortlessly when no one else could?
I stand up before I even realise it. This time, I don’t pretend it’s normal or that it’s a phase.
It’s not, and I’m completely fine with it.
I’m completely fine with Ronan finding me and punishing me and everything in between.
Because the truth is, he’s not normal, and neither am I.
And maybe, just maybe, that’s completely fine.
21
Teal
By the time I arrive at the Meet Up, it’s night-time.
It’s only when I push the door open that I actually take a second to think about what I’m doing.
I came here for Ronan.
He’s also the only one here. I confirmed it when I spotted his car parked outside without a trace of the other guys’ vehicles.
I can do it. I can absolutely do this.
I draw deep breaths in and forge ahead. One foot in front of the other.
One step.
Two steps.
Three steps…
It’s not that hard, and it’s probably the first time I’ve thought about steps while I’m taking them.
It’s like the club all over again — me on my knees waiting for someone to set me free, even if just for the night.
The person I got was the last one on my mind, but maybe, just maybe, like Cole and Knox say, I needed that without even realising it.
Or maybe I’m making a huge mistake.
My thoughts come to a screeching halt and so do my feet when I stand at the entrance of the Meet Up’s small lounge area. There’s a soft yellow light bathing the place, casting a cosy glow on the furniture, yet it feels lonely too.