Ronan: Why the fuck do I have no pride when it comes to you?
Probably the same reason I have no walls when it comes to him. After that therapist called me a well, I started to believe it. I started to think no one could understand me or dig deeper into me, and that’s why I strengthened those walls.
Until he came along.
I’ve never felt as open and as in danger as I do with him. I always thought people aside from my family would eventually leave. Not Ronan.
Never Ronan.
He barged in so easily it’s as if the well never existed.
And that can’t go on.
For his sake, not mine.
He’ll eventually hate me, so I might as well do it now rather than later.
I knock on Dad’s office door.
“Come in.” His reply is curt.
I push the door and step inside, inhaling a deep breath. Dad and Agnus are sitting across from each other in the lounge area. Both their jackets are discarded and they have the cuffs of their shirts rolled up. Dad doesn’t have his tie on, but Agnus still does, and he generally looks in a less dishevelled state. They each have their tablets in hand, which means they’re exchanging data.
“Am I interrupting?” I ask.
Dad’s face eases with a smile. “You can never interrupt me. Come here, Teal.”
I sit by his side, in the spot Dad pats.
Agnus starts to stand up. “I’ll be downstairs if you need anything.”
“You don’t have to leave,” I tell him. “I want to talk to you both.”
Agnus settles back down. Now, as I look at him, I realise whatever I felt for him in the past was fleeting. He’s been there for me and Knox our entire lives, and that gratitude has lived with me for as long as I can remember, but that’s it.
That’s all.
The only consuming feelings I’ve ever had are for this boy who can make me laugh when I didn’t even know that I could.
Dad slides the tablet on the table. “Is something wrong?”
“No…well, maybe.”
“Does it have to do with the fact that you skipped school for two days?” Dad asks.
Why did I think he was too busy to notice that? This is Dad. At some point, he felt my pain before I could notice it myself.
“Dad, promise you won’t hate me?”
“That’s off the table — not even if you killed someone.”
Agnus raises a brow. “We can always cover your tracks.”
Dad gives him a look.
“What?” Agnus lifts a shoulder. “I can help her get away with murder.”
“Don’t put ideas into her head…”