That’s all.
He’s not the one I dream about. He’s not the one I’ve been yearning for, feeling all empty and miserable.
“Ronan wouldn’t agree to that,” I whisper. He’s a player and loves his freedom more than anything in the world.
Dad remains cool and calm. I don’t know how he does it. “Earl Astor said Ronan will agree to anything he asks of him.”
Oh, God.
I’m going to be sick.
“And…” I meet Dad’s gaze. “What did you tell him?”
“I said I’ll talk to you.” Dad takes my hand in his, strong, warm, and safe. “I’ll never force you to do anything, you know that, right, princess?”
Oh. Thank God.
I want to help Dad, but I’ll never agree to an arranged marriage. I want to marry someone I love. Someone who flips my world upside down by just being there.
Someone like Aiden.
Wait… no. Where did that idea come from? I don’t want to marry Aiden… right? It’s too early to even think about marrying Aiden.
Stay the fuck down, heart. Don’t even think about celebrating that thought.
“Think about it,” Dad says. “I’ll go with whatever you decide.”
I’m tempted to tell him ‘no’ straight away, but the look in his eyes stops me. It’s not pleading, but it’s close to… desperation.
Dad needs this alliance.
It hurts me to think about killing all his hopes at once. I need a lot more courage than I have right now.
After agreeing to think about it, I retreat to my room.
I throw my backpack on the chair and flop onto the bed. I hit play on my iPod and Another Place by Bastille fills the air.
What’s the best way to refuse Dad’s offer without being a complete bitch? Either way, he’ll lose Earl Astor and might even be categorised as an enemy by the upper-class community.
Dad spent a lot of energy on this come back. Hell, he returned from the dead. I can’t just destroy his efforts.
Ugh.
This is so confusing.
I need a cup of hot chocolate to calm down. Oh, and my meds. Aunt will call me in a few and give me a lecture if she finds out I didn’t take them.
My heart palpitations have turned up in intensity these last couple of days. I’ll have to cave in and visit Dr Albert.
Please don’t have the doctor suggest a surgery. The thought of another one terrifies the bejesus out of me
My phone vibrates on my way to the kitchen.
My heart beats loudly at the thought that it might be Aiden. What would he say if he found out? Actually, I know what he’ll say.
He’ll ask me to refuse and if I can’t, he’ll do it for me.
Aiden doesn’t care about Dad’s well-being or how much losing Earl Astor’s support would devastate him.