Then she grabbed Tricia’s arm and began making her way to the door. They couldn’t stay now it would be too painful. The crowd parted for them as they went but all eyes were on them and the whispers followed close behind. Tricia knew that it had finally happened.
Just when she’d met a man she wanted to marry—who unbelievably, wanted her in return—she was well and thoroughly ruined.
Chapter Seven
Climbing into the waiting carriage, Tabbie and Tricia rode back to Tabbie’s townhome in silence. Tabbie informed the driver to return as quickly as possible for Luke and Ryker. Tricia didn’t cry, though part of her wanted to. She had told herself it was to be expected. She’d made her choices and she wouldn’t regret them. But their looks had been terrible and, if she were honest, she’d expected to be ruined more quietly. With a gossip column or, perhaps, a ladies’ tea. But to be called out at a crowded ball was so much worse than she’d ever imagined.
At least she’d made arrangements to stay at Tabbie’s so that she wouldn’t have to tell her mother for another day. Her father’s condition had stabilized at least, the only reason she’d been comfortable enough to agree to this entire ordeal.
She wished Ryker had been there. He would have known how to help her.
Ryker.
Tabbie had thought he might ask her to marry him. That was out of the question now. A duke did not marry a fallen woman.
She tried to tell herself that this was what she had wanted before him. At the very least expected. But somehow she hadn’t realized how much Ryker meant to her until she knew she couldn’t have him. A future that allowed her both a family and a meaningful life of charity work. She should have known better. Those futures were only for women who sparkled the way her sister did.
She climbed the stairs with a mumbled goodnight to Tabbie.
“Tricia,” her sister called. “Try not to worry. We’ll have this all sorted by the morning.”
She gave a silent nod as she turned and finished climbing the stairs. Dismissing her maid, she undressed herself, and then looked in the mirror. This was the face of a spinster. A ruined spinster.
But then a new thought occurred to her. If she were to live the life of a ruined woman, shouldn’t she actually be thoroughly and completely ruined? A little thrill raced up her spine. She wanted all of him but she’d settle for his touch, a few stolen moments to last a lifetime.
Why not experience passion once before she dedicated herself to charity? She climbed into bed but her mind simply wouldn’t quiet, thoughts swirling at a frantic pace.
Memories of Herman’s words and the looks and snickers of the crowd filled her with shame. While thoughts of Ryker and the comfort his touch would provide heated her skin.
Slipping back out of bed, she began pulling on more serviceable clothing. Sneaking down the hall, she used the servants’ stairs. Silently, she crept past the kitchen and then slipped out the back door. With any luck, Ryker had yet to arrive home.
She moved in the shadows down the dark streets, the night air filling her lungs and calming her soul.
She knew where Ryker lived, it wasn’t far from Tabbie’s home. The night was quiet and not too cold so she hid herself away near his front door. Saying a silent prayer he hadn’t already arrived home and was safely tucked inside, she settled in to wait.
It was nearly an hour later when the rumbling of wagon wheels caught her notice. She craned her neck up over the shrub she hid behind to see the outline of Luke’s carriage rumbling toward them.
It stopped by the door and Ryker’s voice reverberated through her chest. “Send me word, if you wouldn’t mind, to let me know that they’ve made it safely home.”
“Of course,” Luke’s words more muffled in the carriage but she could still make them out. “The driver said he delivered them, so I am sure they are fine.”
The door snapped closed again as the wheels began to move. She could hear Ryker’s feet on the cobblestones as he made his way up the steps. “Ryker,” she whispered, standing up.
He startled and his hand reached into his coat before his eyes registered her. “Bloody hell, Tricia. What are you doing?”
Skirting around the bush, she made her way up the steps to join him. “Coming to see you, of course.”
His arm reached out to wrap around her waist and then he pulled her tight against him. “I was worried when you left the ball.”
“Oh…that…it couldn’t be helped.” She swallowed a lump in her throat, not wanting to discuss it. It was the very thing she came here to forget. He’d find out eventually, she was sure, but tonight was just about the two of them. She didn’t want Herman ruining that
too.
His lips grazed her forehead. “Are you going to tell me what happened?”
“I’d rather not,” she leaned back to look up at him then.
His eyebrows shot up. “You are never dull, I’ll say that.” He paused searching her face. “If not to tell me what happened, why did you come?”