She had run a business and people had assumed she was okay. Her family had relied on her. No one had ever thought about what she wanted, ever. Except for Gage. Now he cupped her cheek because he could always see through her. Saw what others might miss. Part of her wished she could tell him what had happened, to share the pain, but what good would it do? It was better that he remain blissfully unaware. The burden was hers to carry. No one else’s. And at that moment she let go. If he hadn’t been steadying her, she would have fallen apart completely.
‘The rumours. What were they exactly?’
His gaze hardened. ‘You know.’
She shook her head almost hard enough to give herself vertigo. Tears pricked at her eyes. ‘You have to believe me. I don’t.’
‘Wasn’t what you heard enough? You didn’t want to come with me. I forced you to. You were scared of me and had a lucky escape.’
She gripped at the fabric of his shirt, crushing it in her fingers. ‘Who said those things?’
‘I thought it was you.’
‘Never!’
‘Okay. Let’s assume it wasn’t you.’ He didn’t sound convinced and his frown remained. ‘I can’t believe you’d be so naïve as to not guess who else might have had a reason. There’s only one possibility.’
No. Her father had promised Gage would be left alone. That had been their deal. He’d be left to live his life...and she’d try to pick up the pieces of hers. ‘People make up stories all the time.’
‘And still you defend him. Sure, people make up stories. But every time something great was happening with Caron, a quiet word and investors melted away. I had to fight harder than anyone to keep things going. These anonymous whispers only came out when it would do most damage. And who would want to hurt me if not you? Your father.’
She released the crushed cotton of Gage’s shirt and buried her head in her hands. How could anyone sully the memory of that time? It had been terrifying, exciting, full of promise and hope for the future. That’s what she remembered. And the sense of desperation that they had been each other’s one and only, and no one could tear them apart. Once it had ended, clinging to the hope that what they’d both have left were beautiful memories, and for her that would be enough to survive on.
But to dirty their past this way was unforgivable, hitting deep at the heart of their young love. She’d always believed the deal she’d struck with her f
ather. That she’d leave Gage, and nothing would be said about his family or what had happened. He’d promised.
‘Who promised?’
She’d said that aloud? Part of her wanted to tell Gage, to shout that she’d never stopped loving him and had made a devil’s bargain to protect him.
No wonder Gage hated her, wanted revenge, this charade of a relationship. Because someone had been dripping poison into people’s ears about him for years, poisoning him in the process. Yet another thing she’d have to atone for and fix. Because she would fix this. She’d work day and night to repair the damage her father had done, even if it meant once again sacrificing herself.
‘We should get back to Greta. She’ll be wondering where we are.’
Gage cupped her cheeks and stared down at her in this dim corridor, trying to delve into her soul.
‘You carry a world of pain in your eyes. I want to know why. What’s hurting you?’
How could she answer?
Your dad’s not really your father. You’re someone else’s son. I lost our baby.
She could say all those things. The secrets she’d held onto for years. But what good would it do to unburden them all now?
‘Nothing, other than revisiting our past. I’m all for moving forward.’
He scanned her face, one corner of his mouth quirking up in a tiny smile.
‘Why did I ever believe you were a good liar?’ he murmured.
Because it was easy to lie when she wasn’t standing in front of him. But this had been the flaw in agreeing to the deal to save Knight. Because the man in the flesh was her Kryptonite. She’d been a fool to think that she could carry through with this game. She always held the losing hand, craving his warmth and strength. Especially now. And maybe that was exactly something she could take, something to distract them both from the truths she could never tell. So she grabbed the lapels of his jacket as his eyes darkened. Went up further on her toes and pulled his head down to her lips.
Her kiss demanded hard and passionate, but their lips touched and all Gage gave was gentle. Arms sliding round her back, holding her with a kind of reverence she didn’t deserve. His lips moved over hers, coaxing her to give more than she wanted to. And, still, she couldn’t help falling into it. This kiss that whispered it was more about love than desire. Timeless and endless. Not like the stolen kisses of their youth but something older, wiser and infinitely more dangerous because it carried all the hurts of the past mingled with what felt a lot like forgiveness.
She was held safe, ensnared by all the slick and hypnotising rhythm of it. Never wanting the moment to end. And maybe even if she couldn’t tell him how she felt, she was showing it here. But she was terrified that he was showing her something too. Gage’s hand delved into her hair, holding her tight, giving and taking. His body was hot and hard against hers, his arousal obvious, making her want. The core of her ached, needing him to fill her. Then he slowed, pulled away, his breathing heavy.
‘We need to go,’ she said. She didn’t look at him, because if she did it would likely end her.