“That’s just it. You and I have never been friends.”
A flash of pain slashed across her eyes, totally startling him.
“What I mean is we were always more than just friends.”
She gazed at him, neither confirming nor denying. Unspoken words hung between them. Damn, it would make it so much easier if he knew what her feelings were about this damnable attraction between them.
* * *
Janine’s heart thumped. So he admitted there was something between them. If only he could have done that after Ben had died. If only they had acted on their attraction then.
But it never would have worked. They were just so different.
Still, she couldn’t help asking the question burning in her mind.
“So when you showed up last night … was it a surprise? That it was me. Or did you know beforehand?”
She wouldn’t put it past him to pull a stunt like showing up with Derek to teach her a lesson. Catch her red-handed and call her on her behavior.
But then, his kiss still tingled on her lips … and his tortured words. Oh, God, I can’t do this, he’d said. As if he’d really wanted to follow through with the fantasy.
That wasn’t the Sloan she knew, though. He wouldn’t have sex with a total stranger—if that’s what he’d thought she’d be—and certainly not with another man there.
Unless he’d changed more than she knew.
“I knew it was you.”
She nodded. So he hadn’t changed.
“So you came along just to—”
He held up his hand. “Stop. Before you get all worked up, it wasn’t about checking up on you.”
“Or criticizing my lifestyle? Or trying to change me?”
He smiled. “Well, if there’s anything I’ve learned in life it’s that I can’t change you. You are an unstoppable force.”
“Why did you do it then?”
“Because I want to have sex with you.”
Three
At her widening eyes, Sloan swore to himself. “I mean, I’d like to explore this attraction between us. Start dating. See if things could work out between us.”
“And you wanted our first time to be with another man?” She sank back in the chair. “Well, you have changed.”
“In fact, I have. Despite getting off to a bit of a rocky start the other night, I wanted to prove to you that I can embrace … the wilder side of life.”
She raised an eyebrow and her eyes glittered. “Really? Yet you backed off.”
“Okay, sure. But that was because I realized I couldn’t just have sex with you blindfolded like that.”
She grinned. “Got something against blindfolds?”
“No. I mean, you were expecting a stranger, not someone you knew. Not me. I realized it would be … dishonest. Like I was taking advantage of you.”
“And you didn’t think of that ahead of time?”