My hand moved into the hair at the nape of her neck, and I gently caressed her, my fingers tinging once I embraced my woman. Being on that cold mountain made me long for her even more, long for the bed we shared together. I warmed the sheets throughout the night, and she hugged me like I was her favorite teddy bear.
When she was finally ready, she lifted her gaze to look at me. “You’re right…it’s over. It’s us now. At last.”
“Yes.” I leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. My lips burned the second I felt her, and the guilt inside my chest started to boil. My moral compass had never pointed north, but lying had always been something I despised. It stripped my credibility as a man. A man who lied wasn’t a man at all, because he feared the consequences of his actions. That wasn’t me. I could look her father in the eye and tell him things he didn’t want to hear. But that was still better than pretending to be something I wasn’t.
“My brother had his baby. He’s so—”
“I have to tell you something. I want to get it over with before we change the subject.”
She stilled at the interruption and slowly backed up. “Okay…what is it?” She pulled away and crossed her arms over her chest.
I hated the instant she moved away from me. I hated the space between us, the divide that kept us apart. It just made me want to get this over with even more. “I lied to you.”
Her eyes widened in surprise.
“I did it because I had to. But I promise you, I’ll never do it again.”
“What did you lie about?” Her voice turned firm, her hostility slowly rising.
“The reason why I stayed in Morocco an extra day was because something went wrong.”
She immediately started to breathe hard, the terror moving into her gaze. Her hand moved over her chest, like she was massaging away a dull pain that formed in her heart.
“I took out the target, but his son caught me. He set the alarm, and I had to run. There were too many men on my tail, and Max couldn’t evacuate me. I ditched the car in the mountains then moved on foot. I hiked to a place where they couldn’t find me and waited it out. I was there for about twenty-four hours, waiting for the men to move their search elsewhere. That’s when Max sent the chopper and got me out of there.”
She rubbed her chest, her eyes filled with pain.
“I told Max not to tell you the truth at the time because it would destroy you. There was nothing you could do to help me, and there was no point in worrying. I wasn’t in any serious danger. I just had to be patient before I made my move. I was cautious on purpose. If I didn’t have you, I probably would have had the chopper pick me up right away. But I took my time, knowing I couldn’t take any chances.”
She covered her face with her palms, sighed, and then dragged them down her face. “Not take any chances, huh?” Her cold sarcasm filled the apartment. “A bit ironic…since every time you leave, you’re taking a chance.”
I knew she would be pissed. But there was nothing I could do about it except face it like a man. “It’s over, Vanessa. That was the last one.”
“Like I said, all it takes is one time, and you’re dead.”
“But I’m not dead, baby. I’m home—right now.”
She crossed her arms over her chest again. “I can’t believe you lied to me. You told me you never lie.”
“I know…I didn’t feel good about it.”
“Oh, that makes it better,” she hissed.
I knew she wasn’t really angry about the lie, just the fact that I was ever compromised. “Baby, let it go.”
“You could have died!”
“I wasn’t anywhere close to that. There was just a bump in the road. Big difference.”
She threw her arms down. “Shut up, Griffin.”
My eyes narrowed. “I’m gonna let that comment go because of the context. But don’t ever tell me to shut up again. I love you, baby. But I don’t put up with shit from anyone—including you.”
She averted her gaze, taking my words to heart.
“I’m sorry that I lied. I didn’t know what else to do.”
She tucked her hair behind her ear, her breathing still rapid. “I know…”
“I never want to lie, especially to you. It’s not who I am. I never want to be that kind of man. I despise those kinds of men. But I had to protect you. Your nephew was just born, and I didn’t want to distract you from that, especially when there was nothing you could do anyway.”
“My father could have helped you.”
“And I would rather die than accept his help.”