All that calm makes sense, given that Monique is a librarian. She also has an extremely cool, super huge rare book collection. She has so many first editions that I can never keep up with which ones she actually has and which ones she doesn’t. It’s pretty hard to buy a gift for her unless you get her a modern, trendy book, which she doesn’t actually like, but if it’s a gift, she always thanks me sincerely and reads it anyway. On the other hand, Vera collects things too, but mostly vintage clothes and shoes. Good bacon bits, her shoes are never freaking ending. I also can’t keep up with her shoe collection, but it’s easier to pick out a pair of funky shoes or a cool retro piece than it is to find a rare book.
“Makes sense,” I utter the thought I didn’t voice out loud before.
Vera grins deviously and asks, “Is he hot?”
“I’m not even going to answer that,” I reply, concentrating on the wine instead.
Monique is hosting our get-together tonight. It’s Friday. We always do our girl’s nights on a weekend so we can drink wine and kick back without having to worry about work the next day. I guess I technically work from home, so every day is like the weekend, but Vera and Monique don’t have that pleasure, though they do get their benefits paid for. Oh, and employment insurance, which is a big bonus. They also get paid holidays, overtime, and job security—all those things that self-employed people struggle with.
“That means he is hot!” Vera exclaims. She leans forward so fast on Monique’s sectional that she just about spills red wine all over the place. “Good! You could use some hotness in your life. And you could also use a good dicking.”
Monique gasps and gulps at the same time as she bites back her warning about the sectional being white and hard to clean because it’s micro-suede. Vera realizes her mistake and moderates her excitement. She gives me the stink eye since I got to Monique’s first and claimed the huge cuddle chair. I love that thing. They’re so freaking expensive that I’ve never even thought of getting one, so I was really glad when Monique, who has excellent taste in furniture, splurged when she bought her new condo.
“You realize I’m going to drink so much wine that I’ll have to sleep here,” I say testily and tip back my glass. “That is if you keep pressing me for details and mentioning weenuses with the kind of action words that imply them coming anywhere near me.”
“Hey! This is my house, not hers! But you’re always welcome to sleep here. I know this place is way further away from your house than my last one was. You too, Vera. You can stay too. You can spoon each other on the guest bed.”
“Oooh,” Vera giggles. “It’ll be just like old times!”
There may have been a few times where all three of us slept on the same bed—a twin-sized bed—because we all hated having to flip to see who takes the floor. Monique’s queen bed would feel like heaven, even if I have to share it with Vera.
“I’m kidding,” I announce flatly, tipping my hand. “Just this one glass. I have to be home to let Connie out to pee. Poor thing.”
“She has pee pads. I know you set them out,” Vera protests.
“Yeah, I know. I fed everyone before I left, but I just feel so guilty being gone overnight.”
“Your obviously hot roommate could take care of them.”
“Ha! I’m still not giving you details. And he couldn’t. He’s only been there one night, but it was already chaos.” I know I should explain how I had a part in that, but I don’t want to.
Unfortunately, Vera is as persistent as Pappy S. “You should get his number for me,” she chimes.
“And why would I do that?” I shriek.
“Yeah, how can we be the avowedly single club if you start dating some random guy?” Monique reasons.
“I didn’t say anything about dating,” Vera whines.
“Hooking up with my new roommate would be the only thing worse than having a roommate in the first place. How do you think I’d be able to live that down?”
“Okay, okay, I was just kidding. But don’t you think it’s pathetic that we’re all single? I’m slightly tired of it. I’d like to get poked once in a while. On the regular would be even better.”
“Vera!” Monique is easily scandalized even though she should be used to Vera by now.
“You could get poked and drop out of the singles club if you want. We’d still love you, we promise,” I said evenly. “But just not with my new roommate.”
“You’re acting very cagey about him, and you haven’t given us any details. Do you have a crush on him? Any irrational spikes in jealousy since I started talking?”