A yawn saved her from responding and as it ended, she said, “I’m tired.” She realized how it sounded. That she was letting him know she was not ready to make love with him and though she hadn’t meant it that way, it was for the best. With so much change, she needed to sort through things, come to understand things, come to accept things.
“Eat, then sleep, the night grows late,” he said and walked over to the table.
They ate in bouts of talk and silence until in one such silence, Odran said, “You don’t trust me, do you?”
“I don’t honestly know,” she admitted. “I realized the one thing that you and Saber share is that you both lied to me. If you lied about one thing of major importance, that makes me wonder if a smaller lie would mean nothing to you? And if that is so, how then do I trust you?”
He leaned forward bracing his arms on the table’s edge. “Would you have wed me if you knew my true identity?”
The question startled her and so did the squeeze to her heart. She fought for words as a feeling of dread overtook.
Odran stood, a spark of anger in his bold green eyes. “Your hesitation is answer enough. Do as you will. I have things to see to.”
Her response was so soft it could barely be heard. “Aye, I would have, for I could not bear to think of life without you.”
Chapter 18
Elysia shook her head seeing the sleeping quarters Lendra had been given. It was a small room shared by two other women with barely room for two let alone three.
“This will not do,” Elysia said.
“Dorrit, the woman who runs the keep tells me that I must reside within the keep if you should need me in the middle of the night,” Lendra said.
“That’s nonsense. I have no need of you in the middle of the night. I have my husband,” Elysia said, though where he was last night she had no idea since he never returned to their room.
She had woken several times during the night, searching for her husband’s warmth only to find she was alone. She shook her head again. She did not favor making a fuss, especially with this being her first day here and her surroundings and the people new to her. However, she would not see Lendra made uncomfortable. She had no choice but to address the issue. “This will not do. First, I will see how Lady Margaret fairs, then I will speak to Dorrit.”
Lendra followed behind Elysia as they took the stairs down from the highest part of the keep.
“Did you by chance see my husband this morning, Lendra,” Elysia asked, not mentioning that she herself had not seen him since last night.
The silence from Lendra had Elysia stopping on the curving staircase and sending the woman an anxious look. “I need to rely on the truth from you, Lendra. You are the one person here I know I can trust.”
“Forgive me, my lady—”
Elysia reached out and laid her hand on Lendra’s arm. “Just this once, Lendra, call me Elysia so I know we speak as friends.”
“Aye, Elysia. I hesitated because I don’t want to see you hurt, but it is more important you know word spreads that Lord Odran did not share his wife’s bed last night.” Lendra lowered her voice to a whisper, “Many fear the madness has taken hold of him again. He walked the village endlessly last night and his voice has boomed through the village shouting orders. All avoid him if possible.”
Elysia blamed herself. She had to make this right.
“A misunderstanding between a husband and a wife, that sparked his frustration, nothing more,” Elysia explained.
“You need not tell me, Elysia.”
“I must,” Elysia insisted. “You need to know that Odran is a good man.”
Lendra kept her voice low. “Good or not, he is cursed. Many fear him and from being here only from last night, I see and feel the sadness of this place.”
Elysia hated to admit it, but Lendra was right, she felt it herself and she hadn’t even stepped outside to acquaint herself with the place and its people.
“It even runs through the village,” Lendra said. “I went to look for Bram and I shouldn’t have been surprised, though it was more disappointment when I saw him already working his wiles on the women here, particularly the healer. I think his generous smile drew them to him since I saw few people smiling.”
“If ever you feel you don’t want to remain here, Lendra, I will see you safely returned to Clan Loudon.”
Lendra shook her head vigorously. “No. Absolutely not, Elysia. I will not leave you here alone.”
“I admit I am relieved to hear you say that.” Elysia smiled that she would have a familiar face to trust. “Now let us see how Lady Margaret fairs, then I will see to new quarters for you.”